I got in a fight with my parents again, why can't my parents be happy with me?

Question

I'm 28 years old, I'm a Christian, and I'm gay. Having sex with men is a sin just like having premarital heterosexual sex. I stopped having sex with men years ago, but my parents still verbally abuse of me.

Last year, I began practicing Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. I discovered I have an innate talent for wrestling. I very quickly began getting everyone into submissions. In the last few months, I been winning tournament after tournament.

I should had known better, but I invited my parents to one of my Brazilian Jiu Jitsu tournaments. Instead of congratulating me for winning, they told me off for being so disgusting for wrestling. They began telling me off telling me what a waste of a man I was for nor having a wife or children, and so on.

I don't know what else can I do to make them happy. I have not had sex with men for years. I can't date women, I'm not attracted to women. I don't think it would be fair for a girl to date someone who has zero physical attraction to her.

Why can't my parents stop being so mean to me?

Answer 1

They're narrow-minded. That's all there is to it. And it's not necessarily unfair to date someone with no physical attraction, as long as there is mutual attraction to each other's personalities. Maybe date a girl once? You might make a good friend. I myself am straight, but I have no physical attraction towards either gender. However, I would be willing to date someone because personalities can be alluring. With girls, I talk to them and get to know them as friends. Guys, the same, but if they wanted to date I wouldn't rule it out, even if I'm not gonna start kissing them or anything.

Answer 2

Honestly sweetie you really need to rethink yourself FOR yourself... Do not let your parents influence you anymore... I myself am not a christian, but that doesn't mean you can't be gay, christian, AND have sex with other men... And disregard anyone on here who says that you can't CUZ YOU CAN ... There were actually two gay saints who said they found more affection in each other than with any other woman... Love is love hunny and sex is sex... They all fall under anyreligion nicely and anyone who says otherwise is bullshitting you and tell your parents to look in the new testement for a change, all of the quotes from the bible regarding homosexuality are in the old testement... Not to mention a LOT of churches now open themselves to gay persons... I have friends that are gay AND christian leading wonderful sex lives ^^ they are happy and content (btw I am a wiccan sooo... If u want other pepls opinions I can get some of them on here)

Answer 3

At age 28, you should be out on your own. If you're not, all you're doing is inviting their criticism. FIND a way to get out.



If you ARE on your own, then be polite, courteous, and respectful, and continue to love them, but limit your contact. It's what many of us have to do when our parents disapprove of us, regardless of the reason for that disapproval. Loving and respecting your parents does NOT obligate an adult to share every detail of their lives with their parents, and if you are still doing so, it's time you put a halt to it.



Good luck.

Answer 4

You could try this: talk to the pastor where your parents attend and explain to him the problem and ask him to talk to them. If he understands you and sees the mistakes your parents are making, then this will definitely help I believe. It wouldn't hurt to talk to him and see if he will be understanding and helpful. If not, then you can forget him. And what I'd suggest after that is get some counseling from your own pastor. Since you're not getting along with your parents I'm guessing you are probably going to another church? So, get some counseling from a spirit-filled counselor of a Full Gospel church is my advice.

Answer 5

They have a sufficiently narrow view of life that they probably cannot ever accept who you are. Now the question is can you accept who you are?



The idea that you must spend the rest of your life being celibate makes no sense to me. I understand that many Christians feel that's the way it has to be, but many do not, as well. Find yourself a church that is accepting of homosexuality, and perhaps they can give you the tools you need to bring your parents around.

Answer 6

it doesn't seem that your parents will change any time soon, so stop trying to please them. let them live their own lives and get busy living yours.



denying what you are to please someone else is not good. if it turned out tomorrow that gay is "right" and hetero is "wrong", i can guarantee you that your parents wouldn't break up to please you. right now, they're doing what's right for them. you should do the same for yourself.



it's good that you've found something that keeps you occupied and active. you are certainly not a failure. and frankly, i see it as noble - although unwise - that you've turned away from your true self rather than pretend to be something you're not. but maybe it's time to stop that.



stop saying no to a good relationship. our time on this planet is brief. would you want to become an old man never having even given yourself a chance to find the love you deserve?

Answer 7

I think you should print out this question and show it to your parents. Personally, I give you *major* credit for staying celibate in obedience to God!



Also, please try to see it from your parents' perspective. Because homosexuality is a genetic dead end, their basic human hope of progeny is dashed (unless you have straight siblings). That's bound to cause them some disappointment and frustration. Maybe they can't show you patience, love and understanding right now, but you *can* show those things to them.



If you're a Christian, please put this matter in God's hands in prayer, every single day. And *trust* Him! May He bless you and your parents.

Answer 8

Because they have not tried to understand what homosexuality is truly about.



All YOU can do is continue to live your life as a gay Christian man and pray that they will be able to accept you as God created you.

Answer 9

Forget what your parents do or say and stop taking the mythology of the ancient Middle East seriously. If you are gay then be gay - there is no reason to be celibate.

Answer 10

Don't you think it's about time you grow up and stop worrying about what your parents do to you?

Answer 11

Why don't you move out and live on your own?

Answer 12

Be yourself and dont be ashamed of who your meant to be. I hope one day your parents accept you, but if not please accept yourself and find love and happiness in your life

Answer 13

Tell your parents to **** off, and reexamine the bible.

Answer 14

The condom broke and their still pissing about that.