I believe you but there is still hope for you.
Jesus told Nicodemus, "You must be Born Again to see the Kingdom of God."
John 3:3 Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.
When Jesus told Nicodemus he needed to be born again He compared the born again experience with a story that Nicodemus knew, the story of Moses and the brass serpeant and in doing so, He gave us a model to help us understand what it means to be Born Again.
If we examine the elements of the story we see that;
1. the people were grumbling against God,
2. God sent snakes to bite them and they were poisoned,
3. they repented, Moses prayed and God gave them a remedy for their poisoned condition, a brass serpeant on a pole,
4. God told them to look at the remedy and believe and He would heal them, and
5. anyone that did this was healed.
Likewise,
1. we (all mankind) are sinful because of the snake (the devil) and Adam and Eve's disobedience,
2. we have been poisoned by sin,
3. we will die spiritually unless we get help,
4. God sent Jesus to die on the cross as the remedy for our sins, and
5. if we believe in Jesus as The Lamb of God who takes away the sins of this world (our sins) we will be healed and live, eternally.
And, that is in complete agreement with The Bible and this verse, The blood of Jesus Christ cleanses us from all sin. 1 John 1:7b
If you want to be born again, this is what you need to do.
Bow your head and pray.
Say, "Dear God,
I have sinned and I am sorry,
I believe that you sent Jesus to save me from my sins,
I want to accept Jesus as my savior and I want to be forgiven,
I ask that you forgive me.
In Jesus name I pray,
Amen.
P.S. 1. Read your Bible,
2. go to a Bible believing church (do they believe Born Again?),
2. thank God for forgiving you of your sins (every day), and
3. live your life for God.