Have you seen teh Resume of Jesus Christ?

Question

The Resume of Jesus Christ


Address: Ephesians 1:20
Phone: Romans 10:13
Website: The Bible. Keywords: Christ, Lord, Savior and Jesus

Hello. My name is Jesus -The Christ. Many call me Lord! I've sent you my resume because I'm seeking
the top management position in your heart.
Please consider my accomplishments as set forth in my resume.


Qualifications
I founded the earth and established the heavens, (See Proverbs 3:19)

I formed man from the dust of the ground, (See Genesis 2:7)

I breathed into man the breath of life, (See Genesis 2:7)

I redeemed man from the curse of the law, (See Galatians 3:13)

The blessings of the Abrahamic Covenant comes upon your life through me, (See Galatians 3:14)


Occupational Background

I've only had one employer, (See Luke 2:49).

I've never been tardy, absent, disobedient, slothful or disrespectful.

My employer has nothing but rave reviews for me, (See Matthew 3:15-17)


Skills Work Experiences

Some of my skills and work experiences include: empowering the poor to be poor no more, healing the

brokenhearted, setting the captives free, healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind and setting at


liberty them that are bruised, (See Luke 4:18).

I am a Wonderful Counselor, (See Isaiah 9:6). People who listen to me shall dwell safely and shall not


fear evil, (See Proverbs 1:33).

Most importantly, I have the authority, ability and power to cleanse you of your sins,


(See I John 1:7-9)


Educational Background

I encompass the entire breadth and length of knowledge, wisdom and understanding,


(See Proverbs 2:6).

In me are hid all of the treasures of wisdom and knowledge, (See Colossians 2:3).

My Word is so powerful; it has been described as being a lamp unto your feet and a lamp unto


your path, (See Psalms 119:105).

I can even tell you all of the secrets of your heart, (See Psalms 44:21).


Major Accomplishments

I was an active participant in the greatest Summit Meeting of all times, (See Genesis 1:26).

I laid down my life so that you may live, (See II Corinthians 5:15).

I defeated the archenemy of God and mankind and made a show of them openly,


(See Colossians 2:15).

I've miraculously fed the poor, healed the sick and raised the dead!

There are many more major accomplishments, too many to mention here. You can read them on my


website, which is located at: www dot - the BIBLE. You don't need an Internet connection or


computer to access my website.




References

Believers and followers worldwide will testify to my divine healings, salvation, deliverance, miracles,


restoration and supernatural guidance.


In Summation
Now that you've read my resume, I'm confident that I'm the only candidate uniquely qualified to fill


this vital position in your heart. In summation, I will properly direct your paths, (See Proverbs 3:5-6),
and lead you into everlasting life,(See John 6:47). When can I start? Time is of the essence,

(See Hebrews 3:15).

Answer 1

You obviously know nothing about Jesus. Read the Bible, or at least the first book in it.



Jesus didn't do most of those things, nor would he claim to.

Answer 2

Your faith will keep you, wait and notice. whilst a while on the earth is up, Jesus is possibly to be the 1st person you meet in Heaven. detect a Bible-based church and get Baptized, then you would be 'in like Flynn'.

Answer 3

I have worked in Human Resources, if I actually received this one I would probably relegate that resume to the "Deep Six" file. Some how, I could not suggest or forward this file to management. I am sorry, perhaps you might try the telephone company, someone told me that they had Thor in collections/accounts receivable!

Answer 4

Did You write this ? This is so brilliant and so beautiful,God Bless you for sharing.

Answer 5

is this a question? or an atempt to get people to look into a bible

Answer 6

hahah great job.

Answer 7

Hired sometime ago !!!

Answer 8

that was absolutely awesome!!

Answer 9

lol thanks for the laugh