My Christian friend believe that being gay is a sin. Should I drop this person as a friend?

Question

She is a Christian and i am a gay atheist. We have gotten along for awhile but i feel like a fool. I didn't come into this friendship putting her down but she ,because of her religion, puts me down. I thought i could just be friends with her but i don't think i can. She uses the hate the sin not the sinner line but when u dig deeper she believes in the bible that gay people are sick perverts who should be burned and tortured for being gay or having gay thoughts unless they apologize to an unchanged God who they believe is Jesus who said that gay people should be put to death in the past but now just want to throw them in hell. They don't just disagree with someone being gay they wont/think something should happen to the gay person. It's just a headache. I have told her how i felt about this but she will then say "well i should be damned too" which means that she agrees that gays should suffer and she thinks more people should be damned as well. Just a negative outlook on everything. i feel like with all the people on this planet i can find someone that i don't have to work thru their Christian prejudices or listen to the depressing stories about how they love something that wants/think should destroy them and others. I feel like i can do way better....

Answer 1

You could try to enlighten her -- but if she truly believes what you've posted, there is no need to surround yourself with such negative energy.



See if this enlightens her:



Either we are all children of God or none of us are. If Christians believe God is justice and a loving God and love comes from God, then how can we believe a loving God would condemn two people for falling in love, and expressing that love physically, in a committed, loving relationship? Wouldn't that be entrapment? How is that "justice"?



Homosexuality is part of the natural world -- homosexuality exists in EVERY mammalian species. Homosexuals have been part of the human experience since recorded history. So apparently they too have a purpose in God’s plan.



Human sexuality is a complex system of physical, biological factors and those who claim they can "choose" to be homosexual must be bisexual themselves, and in any case, you cannot choose who to fall in love with!



The Hebrew term for “offensive thing” (to’evah) in Leviticus 18 is translated as “abomination,” but it refers to the 600 + Temple purity rules in place for the Temple priests, etc. Abomination is the common translation for several Hebrew words; however, like many Hebrew words context determines meaning.



To'evah is usually translated as abomination - although it is strictly to do with 'a ritual abomination.' Is your friend abstaining from wearing clothing of mixed fabrics, or eating shellfish?



Certain homosexual behaviors (in the famous, and ignorantly quoted, Leviticus verse) is to'evah a RITUAL violation.

The bigots like your friend, had better not be eating lobster or crab, or wearing polyester/cotton blend shirts or I guess they are also condemning themselves, right?



Having sex with your daughter in law is 'tevel' (a perverse abomination). So if homosexuality is so “perverse” why isn’t this word used instead?



'Zimah' is a depraved abomination. Again, if homosexual relationships are so offensive to God, why wasn’t this word used?



Rabbi's have been speaking out against the misuse of the Torah to justify bigotry toward gays. The "abominations" listed have to do with male prostitution, pagan rituals and behavior, and other Temple violations. The Temple priests had lots of rules to keep them from falling into pagan behaviors, since pagans surrounded the Hebrew communities and God’s “chosen people” needed to be vigilant about keeping themselves separate.



Likewise the "sins" of Sodom and Gomorrah have more to do with being greedy and mistreating the poor than with homosexuals.

http://home.earthlink.net/~ecorebbe/id18.html



As for the New Testament - Paul wrote in Greek. There was a very common Greek word for male to male homosexual sex back then ("paiderasste”), but Paul never used it. Why not? Maybe because that wasn't what he was referring to at all! Paul was actually referring to male prostitution, keeping young boys as sex slaves, and other immoral acts.

Promiscuity is sinful.

Lust (seeking power over another) is sinful.

Falling in love is NOT “sinful.”



There are only THREE verses from Paul's letters that have been mis-translated and taken out of context to be about homosexuality. Shame on the people who have done so.

http://www.religioustolerance.org/homars…



I'm no fan of evangelicals, but this guy has some good points:

http://homebrewedchristianity.com/2012/0…



The so-called "Christians" who are hate filled bigots should be ashamed and the "hate the sin" line is pure b.s. b/c it is NOT a "sin" to be how God made you!! Celibacy is a willing sacrifice -- NOT something God imposes on people -- again, that would be entrapment!



The haters will be held accountable for every gay teen who commits suicide because of their pseudo-"Christian" bigotry, and for every gay person who is persecuted and executed overseas as the result of hate-filled "missionaries". She should think about that.



If people are so opposed to gay couples getting married, then we should take away all of the legal rights & protections, tax & insurance benefits that straight couples automatically get when they are married. Make it a purely religious ceremony, with no legal status whatsoever.

Otherwise, denying gay couples those same legal rights, benefits and protections is just flat out discriminatory.

Answer 2

If I were you, I'd only keep the friendship going if she can be respectful towards you. She has already told you how she feels about gays and God. Now she needs to knock it off or lose you. I hate what this is doing to you. Its not worth it. Tell her that! And you don't mean you'll feel better when you stop being gay. Ask her if she can stop being straight...what would it take? The thing I hate the most personally about this is they think gays are hurting themselves and their lifestyle is harmful and toxic. She doesn't know any better. She's mostly parroting what she's heard. Maybe she could 'feel you' on this. If she can't, then she's not a good friend.

Answer 3

It's been my experience that some Christians are excellent friends and some just aren't. From a personal point of view a so-called friend who insists that something as essential to who you are as your sexual orientation is perverted or evil probably shouldn't be on your friend list regardless of how often they insist they hate the sin and not the sinner. The vast majority of human beings are incapable of separating the two and the fact that this individual deals with this largely irreducible conundrum with such a trite and cutesy easily regurgitated comeback indicates that they're incapable of even recognizing the problem.

Answer 4

Her being a Christian she should love you, even if she does not agree with your choices. Jesus came into the world nit to condemn the world but to save the world through Him. Jesus came out of love to save.all sinners. Being attracted to the same sex is not sinful, but it is the sexual relations between same sex individuals that is sinful. I am a Christian too, and if I could talk to your friend I would tell her ti go read her bible, because by shutting you out she doesnt understand how Gods love works. We are nit to judge others or we will be judged, and we must love our neighbor as we love ourselves. Jesus even prayed on the cross when He was near death in excruciating pain, saying "Father, please forgive them, they dint know what they are doing." That is how much Jesus loves people, He loved people who were killing Him.



I would not be concerned over you being gay, but concerned that you are an atheist. I wish I could counsel you more. The invitation is open for you to message me if you want to learn more. God has so much to offer.



God wants all people to come just as they are. It is up to Him to mold us, not others who judge us.

Answer 5

Yes, I know what you mean. One of my friends went "rabid religious" - nothing like a convert for being really strict.



Suddenly from being her friend and our children playing together, she told me I was too sinful and also my kids, so .......they couldn't be friends any more!! How sad is that. Sure Jesus wouldn't have approved.



Then when my son came out as gay......well, you'd have thought he'd bug.......d the Pope! foaming at the mouth she was....my beautiful boy ......a heart surgeon saving life every day but.....to her a wicked sinner. And he used to love her and her children.....so sad.



Haven't seen any of the family for years now. I just wonder how they are. Tried once to get in touch....no response.



Mo

Atheist

Answer 6

There comes a point in your young life when you begin to migrate away from friends who were your friends only because of circumstances. Were you in a class together? Is she someone from a group of existing friends? A friend from a job or club?



As you grow older, you find yourself making friends that are well suited to you rather than suited to the situation.



Sorry to read about your issues. Realizing a friend is not a friend really hurts.

Answer 7

Don't drop them as a friend. That would be like them dropping a gay person as a friend. As long as you can get along and have different views, stay friends!

Answer 8

No some people believe being gay is a sin. If they go far as to hate and bully gays then you should drop them but if they just disagree with them I see no reason to drop them.

Answer 9

As a bisexual Christian I think you should make up your own mind. I don't want to tell you about a relationship that I am not a part of. Some CHristians think that they themselves are not sinners. So they harp on people as if their side of life is clean and pure as the driven snow.

Answer 10

There's no need to be around someone who is going to insist on being negative towards you. In the real world you don't call that a friend, you call that an enemy or an asshole.



If she rigidly sticks to her beliefs rather than trying to perceive most, if not all, people as generally good and decent deep down, not people who wake up in the morning and say "how shall I be evil today" (see: bible, saturday morning cartoon villains), then she's moronic, misguided, zealous and.... damn, I already said moronic, didn't I?



furthermore, if she's someone who actively believes that you, as a person, as someone who, quite frankly, sounds sane, adjusted and decent, should be burned and tortured then she's now a moronic, sadistic PSYCHOPATH!

I managed to slip in "moronic" again.



If she's one of the people who insists that you choose to be gay or that you "choose to sin", the silly cow, then you must tell her that, if it is so easy to choose to be gay then she must prove it for one day. tell her to switch her sexuality. like a light-switch, is it?



This person believes torture is Necessary..... what, was she the anus-spawned filth of Adolf Hitler?

You, most absolutely, positively, without a shadow of a doubt, don't need trash like this in your life.

Do not be polite, do not be courteous, be direct, blunt and brutal as blunt force trauma! tell her how it is, tell her to pull that crucifix out from where it's obviously causing her some distress and to grow up and that the only people who accept people like her are the Westboro crowd.... which, in itself, is a harsher insult than that Hitler line.





whatever she says afterwards, tell her if she wants a comeback, she can scrape it off her next boyfriend's teeth.



if symptoms persist: restraining order.

















or you can tell her to keep her self serving, bigoted, hate-fueled, moronic opinions to herself.

Said moronic three times! Bingo!





(All these like minded fools saying "you should listen to her and change yourself to suit our view"... The well spoken, sane gentleman posing the quandry is in the "wrong" but the zealous religious bird who thinks everyone else should be horribly butchered, slaughtered and tortured is in the "right"?



LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! I PRESENT TO YOU: RELIGIOUS MORALITY!)

Answer 11

If I were you, I would tell her to go fvck herself right away.

And so to you homophobic christians posting here. Your kind will dissapear in the future and people will laugh at your ignorance and discrimination. Just like we do now to the racist people in the past.

Answer 12

You are putting her down right now. If someone posted this about me I would be p'od.



I don't know whether you can do 'way better' but why would you force yourself on someone who's deepest beliefs are the opposite of yours.



She could accept you if you were trying to change but as it is you are probably forcing her hand. Me or Jesus ? That is not fair.

Answer 13

um yea,i dont think an atheist would get along with a christian, especially a gay one at that. its eaither you change or you leave.

Answer 14

No, this person might be God's way of getting your attention and reminding you to repent of your filthy lifestyle!



What is funny is that, some people think that Christians who propagate the earth the way God intended will go extinct! But, how can homosexuals propagate? They are the ones who will go extinct!

Answer 15

if true and i doubt that. there is a clear spiritual standard and we humankind cannot mess this up.

most important for a believer is to be a good example and practice the teaching of the Lord well.

only so we will be able to reach the peoples heart.

and by the way, Jesus is God´s son and our messiah.



j

Answer 16

Homosexual acts are a sin yes, but there was no point telling you that, since you're not a Christian. Only Christians are bound by Christian rules.

Answer 17

except the truth shes telling you, she is trying to protect you, or be ignorant and embrace the lie and leave her

Answer 18

You are both sinners. Get over your "self".

Answer 19

yes



don't surround yourself with ignorance, you will have a fuller life without XTAIN LIES

Answer 20

You should consider listening to her.

Answer 21

she's probably your dearest friend

listen to her

who else cares about your eternity?

Answer 22

Well either accept the truth she is telling you, or embrace the lie and drop her.