What sort of proof do you want? What sort of evidence will you consider legite?
If someone says, The Bible says God is real. Would you accept that?
If someone says, God changed my life. Would you accept that?
If someone says, Here is a website. Would you accept it?
Or
Would you the ONLY proof you would desire is if God Himself appeared before you? Even then, would you accept it?
Do I know the answer? No, only you do.
I can say, yes God is real. However, you would not take me at face value...
Likewise you say God is not real and so I will not take you at face value.
Nevertheless, www.carm.org has a lot of good stuff if you are interested.
Proof is in the eye of the beholder.
Over Three Hundred Disproofs of God’s Existence
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(adapted from Atheists of Silicon Valley (aka Godless Geeks) which they claim was in turn adapted from a forum on the Internet Infidels)
by J. H.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TRANSCENDENTAL ARGUMENT
God doesn’t exist.
If God doesn’t exist, then if reason exists, then God doesn’t exist.
Reason exists.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
COSMOLOGICAL ARGUMENT
If I say something doesn’t have a cause, it doesn’t have a cause.
I say the universe doesn’t have a cause.
Therefore, the universe doesn’t have a cause.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (I)
I define God to be X.
Since I cannot conceive of X, X must not exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT (II)
I can’t conceive of a perfect God.
One of the qualities of perfection is existence.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
MODAL ONTOLOGICAL ARGUMENT
God doesn’t exist.
God, if existing, is either necessary or unnecessary.
God is not necessary, therefore God must be unnecessary.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT
Check out the world/universe/giraffe. Isn't it complex?
Evolution (aka random chance) is a good enough explanation for me how they became so complex.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BEAUTY (aka TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT II)
Isn't that baby/sunset/flower/tree beautiful?
Evolution (aka random chance) is a good enough explanation for me how they became so beautiful.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF MIRACLES (I)
My aunt had cancer.
The doctors gave her all these horrible treatments.
My aunt prayed to God, but she died from her cancer anyway.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
MORAL ARGUMENT (I)
Person X, a well-known theist, was morally inferior to the rest of us.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
MORAL ARGUMENT (II)
In my younger days I thought I was religious.
Now I’m a cursing, drinking, smoking, gambling, child-molesting, thieving, murdering, atheist jerk.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CREATION VS EVOLUTION
If evolution is true, then creationism is false, and therefore God doesn’t exist.
Creation can’t be true, since I lack the mental capacity to understand it and am not at all interested in studying it; moreover, to accept its truth would cause me to be uncomfortable
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF FEAR
If God exists then I’m going to Hell.
I’m not afraid of Hell. New Jersey is much worse.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE BIBLE
[Arbitrary passage from OT]
[Arbitrary passage from NT]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INTELLIGENCE
Look, there's really no point in me trying to explain the whole thing to you stupid theists -- it's too complicated for you to understand. God doesn’t exist whether you like it or not.
Therefore, doesn’t God exist.
ARGUMENT FROM UNINTELLIGENCE
Okay, I don't pretend to be as intelligent as you guys -- you're obviously very well read. But I read the Skeptics Annotated Bible, and nothing you say can convince me that God exists. I don’t feel him in my heart, and you are lying when you say you can feel him and see him working in your life. John 3:16 - "For God so loved the world that he sent his only begotten son into the world, that whosoever believes in him shall not perish from the earth?" That just proves what a evil, sadistic loser your God is.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF BELIEF
If God exists, then I should believe in Him.
I don’t believe in God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INTIMIDATION
See my fist?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
PARENTAL ARGUMENT
My mommy and daddy told me that God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM NUMBERS
Millions and millions of people don’t believe in God.
They can't all be wrong, can they?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ABSURDITY (aka THE MOST COMMON ATHEIST ARGUMENT)
B---s---!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ECONOMY
God doesn’t exist, you bastards!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
BOATWRIGHT'S ARGUMENT
Ha ha ha.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INSANITY
I forgot to take my meds.
Therefore, THERE IS NO GOD!!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM GUITAR MASTERY
Some say that Eric Clapton is God, but I hate his music.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INTERNET AUTHORITY
There is a website that successfully argues for the non-existence of God.
Here is the URL.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INCOMPREHENSIBILITY
Flabble glurk zoom boink blubba snurgleschnortz ping!
No one has ever refuted 1.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM AMERICAN EVANGELISM
Telling people that God exists makes some televangelists filthy rich.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PUTTING THE CART BEFORE THE HORSE
The Christian God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, all worldviews which assume the Christian God's existence are false and incomprehensible.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BLINDNESS (I)
Christians are blind to reason, intelligence and logic.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BLINDNESS (II)
God is hate.
Hate isn’t blind.
Ray Charles is blind.
Therefore, Ray Charles isn’t God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FALLIBILITY
Human reasoning is inherently flawed.
Therefore, there is no reasonable way to challenge a proposition.
I propose that God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SMUGNESS
God doesn’t exist.
I don't give a crap whether you believe it or not; I have better things to do than to try to convince you morons.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM META-SMUGNESS
F--- you.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MANIFESTATIONS
People who see images of bearded faces or virgins in things like tortillas are fruitcakes and represent the whole of theism.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM KITCHEN APPLIANCES
My toaster isn’t God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM COMPLETE DEVASTATION
A plane crashed killing all 143 passengers and crew.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM POSSIBLE WORLDS
If things had been different, then things would be different.
That would be good.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SHEER WILL
I DON’T believe in God! I DON’T believe in God! I don’t I don’t I don’t I DON’T believe in God!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM NONBELIEF
The majority of the world's population are nonbelievers in Christianity.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM POST-DEATH EXPERIENCE
Person X died an theist.
He now realizes his mistake.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL
God doesn’t exist.
If you believe in him, people will always laugh at you.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INCOHERENT BABBLE
See that person spazzing on the church floor babbling incoherently?
That represents theism as a whole.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE HUMAN SPIRIT
The human spirit doesn’t exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
DONAHUE'S ARGUMENT
Check out this video segment.
Now how can anyone watch that and believe in God?
Is the caller there?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ANTI-CALVINISTIC ARGUMENT
If God exists, then unbelievers will be tortured forever.
I don’t like that idea.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CROCKERY
Pots can give orders to the potter as long as the pots think they are morally superior somehow.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PRODUCT EVOLUTION
Barbie dolls evolved.
If Barbie dolls evolved, then so did plants and animals.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PAROCHIALISM
God is supposedly everywhere.
I haven’t personally seen God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM UPPERCASE ASSERTION
GOD DOESN’T EXIST! GET USED TO IT!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INFINITE REGRESS
Ask theists how the universe came to be.
Regardless of their answer, ask how they know this.
Continue process until the theist admits he doesn't know the answer to one of your questions.
You win!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INCREDULITY
How could God exist, you bozo?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM IGNORANCE OF HISTORY
The Bible is completely false.
Therefore, the Bible is toilet paper.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM RESURRECTION
If God exists, then he would be bringing people who have been decapitated back to life.
No one who has been decapitated has been brought back to life.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BIOGENESIS
Where did life come from, dummy?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM STEADFAST ATHEISM
A lot of really cool people didn’t believe in God their entire lives.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LONELINESS
Christians say that Jesus is their best friend.
I'm lonely, but Jesus hasn’t showed up.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MONTY PYTHONISH ARGUMENTATION (aka ARGUMENT FROM CONTRADICTON aka ARGUMENT FROM THE AUTOMATIC GAINSAYING OF ANYTHING THE OTHER PERSON SAYS)
God doesn’t exist.
[Theist's counterargument]
No he doesn’t.
[Theist's counterargument]
No he doesn’t!
[Theist's counterargument]
NO HE DOESN’T!!!
[Theist gives up and goes home]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CREATIVE INTERPRETATION
Here’s what some theists said about what God is: (a) The feeling you have when you look at a newborn baby. (b) The love of a mother for her child. (c) Humankind's potential to overcome their difficulties. (d) How I feel when I look at a sunset. (e) The taste of ice cream on a hot day.
These are all silly and superficial.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INSECURITY
We have gone to absolutely berserk lengths to establish that theists are laughable morons.
Actually, we did so in the hopes of curing our own insecurities about atheism -- but there's no chance in hell we'll ever admit that.
Therefore, theists are laughable morons.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF SUPERIORITY
If God exists, then Christians are superior beings, since they are "special" in a cosmic sense.
But Christians aren’t superior. They’re the same as everyone else.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MORAL STANDARDS
There are no absolute moral standards because God doesn’t exist.
Theists say that there are absolute moral standards.
But that's only because they want to condemn everyone (especially atheists) but themselves as sinners.
Therefore, there are no absolute moral standards.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM HUMAN NECESSITY
Theists say that everyone needs God.
Atheists say that they don’t need God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM HIDDEN LOGIC (I)
Intellectually, I know that the existence of God is possible, or very probable.
But I must put on the appearance of being cool and intellectual in front of my atheist peers.
Therefore, I must pretend that 1 is false.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DENYING THE BODY
Theists like to think that they can control their "sinful" desires.
But they're theists, so they can't.
Therefore, some theists feel the need to take no enjoyment in anything because they are always worrying about committing sin.
This just goes to show how their belief in God is damaging to their lives.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM HATE
Some theists hate atheists and atheism.
That's because they believe in God.
Pathetic, aren't they?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SCIENTISTS WHO ARE THEISTS
A certain scientist says that God does exist.
But God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, he cannot be accepted as an expert on the matter, because he is wrong.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EVIL SPIRITS
I've never had contact with evil spirits.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM HIDDEN LOGIC (II)
Theists say that God does exist.
But they only say that because they want to look holy and righteous in front of their peers.
They don't fool me!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM HOVIND'S CHALLENGE
Kent Hovind offers $250,000 (which may or may not exist) to anyone who can demonstrate evolution (defined as a natural, acausal origin of the universe) to a reasonable doubt (meaning with 100% certainty, allowing for no other possibilities whatsoever) in front of a neutral committee (handpicked by Hovind himself) and according to certain criteria (carefully worded so as to rule out any possibility whatsoever of the challenge ever being met).
Atheists have dismissed this challenge as false, illogical, ignorant or otherwise bogus.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INSANITY
No sane person could have thought up Christianity.
Therefore, it was thought up by an insane person or persons.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EXHAUSTION (abridged)
Do you agree with the utterly trivial proposition X?
Theist: of course.
How about the slightly modified proposition X'?
Theist: Um, no, not really.
Good. Since we agree, how about Y? Is that true?
Theist: No! And I didn't agree with X'!
With the truths of these clearly established, surely you agree that Z is true as well?
Theist: No. So far I have only agreed with X! Where is this going, anyway?
I'm glad we all agree.....
[Atheist goes on and on and on...]
So now we have used propositions X, X', Y, Y', Z, Z', P, P', Q and Q' to arrive at the obviously valid point R. Agreed?
Theist: Like I said, so far I've only agreed with X. Where is this going?
[Atheist continues to go on and on and on...]
So we now conclude from this that propositions L'', L''' and J'' are true. Agreed?
I HAVEN'T AGREED WITH ANYTHING YOU'VE SAID SINCE X! WHERE IS THIS GOING!?
[Still going...]
...and it follows that proposition HRV, SHQ'' and BTU' are all obviously valid. Agreed?
[Theist either faints from overwork or leaves in disgust]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ALT.ATHEISM ARGUMENT (aka ARGUMENT FROM GENERAL INQUIRY)
Question for theist population: [apparently random question]
Your answer is wrong.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PLAGERISM
I have written the following to demonstrate the non-existence of God.
[Insert plagerized text of someone else’s article]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM USE OF THE SMEAR CAMPAIGN
When it comes to Christians, smearing their reputation is a higher calling than truth.
Christians are all dirty, stinking liars.
Therefore, God does not exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LIMITED VOCABULARY
You don’t understand all the big words I use.
Therefore, I cannot possibly expect you to understand my refutation of your position.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SELECTIVE MEMORY
[Atheist asks "stumper" question]
[Christian answers question]
[A lapse of time]
[Atheist repeats question]
[Christian repeats answer]
[A lapse of time]
[Atheist repeats question]
[Christian repeats answer]
[A lapse of time]
Christian, you never answered my question.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DIVINE ECONOMICS
Many Christian nations are poor or currently suffering poor economies.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PERSONAL SANITY
I've never had any experiences that can be explained only from the presumption that God exists.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INSTITUTIONAL LONGETIVITY
Atheism has been around for a long time.
Therefore, God doesn’t exists.
ARGUMENT FROM INEVITABILITY
I have proof that God doesn’t exist.
I won't bother to tell you what it is because, being theists, you would be hostile to the conclusion anyway.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM "THE MATRIX"
We cannot prove that we don't live in a Matrix-like world.
Therefore we cannot know reality.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SUBJECTIVITY
Everything is subjective.
No subjective proof can be superior to any other subjective proof.
Based upon my subjective opinion, your opinion, that nothing is subjective then, perforce, God isn’t subjective, is false.
Therefore, God (objectively) doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM POSTMODERNISM
I'm going to prove to you that God doesn’t exist.
[Insert any of the other arguments on this page in here]
[Theist refutes argument]
I cannot disprove God anymore than anyone of us can disprove we really exist in a tangible world.
Therefore, God doesn’t exists.
META-DISPROOF
This is a disproof of God's existence.
If the reader finishes reading this disproof, the non-existence of God will be proven to him/her.
If the non-existence of God is proven, then God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
DISPROOF BY ANECDOTE
Those who believe in God say they can see Him.
If God exists, then He must be seen by everyone.
I haven’t seen God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BIBLICAL HISTORY
Some modern historians think that there probably wasn’t somebody named Jesus, maybe.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DEMONS
Some people say that demons were tap-dancing on their roof one day and that prayer made them go away.
Therefore, these people are insane.
Also, God doesn’t exist.
SAM GIBSON’S... ER... CYGNUS’ ARGUMENT (aka ARGUMENT FROM PI)
This verse from the Bible proves that God says pi = 3.
I asked some online math experts about this, but they didn’t support me.
So I twisted their responses to make it appear that they supported me.
Then I made sure to kick people out of my forums and threatened to post their personal information because they tried to show everyone that the math experts didn’t support me, but I said it’s because they didn’t stop using my real name (even though it’s found about a dozen times on my website).
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MULTIPLICITY
I have a large number of arguments against God.
One of them is probably true.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FORTUITOUS COINCIDENCE
Theists often show the astronomical odds of something happening.
I claim that their odds are false and misrepresentative, and also make reference to the Many Worlds Theory, which I completely believe in even though there is no physical evidence for it nor will evidence ever be found.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DAVID BLAINE
If David Blaine does real magic, then God doesn’t exist.
It looked real on his TV special.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MYSTERIOUS USE OF PREPOSITIONS
It is impossible to prove God with your puny theist intellect.
I’ll take that puzzled look on your face as proof that I am right.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TEEN ATHEISM MOVEMENT
Theism totally sucks, dude, and if you would pretend that Marilyn Manson is a good band, you would realize that.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SPEAKING IN TOUNGES
Some theists who I see as representing the whole of theism spontaneously speak some jibberish that they claim is some foreign language or another.
But no one can understand what they are saying.
The only explanation is that they are full of it.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EUROPEAN HISTORY
Many prominent thinkers in pre-modern Europe didn’t believe in God.
Let’s just forget about those who did.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DESIGN
If there is a designer, then God must exist.
If I find a watch in a forest, there must be a designer.
[Atheist ignores the watch in forest]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM (GENERAL) OFFENSE
God doesn’t exist.
[Theist makes counterarguments]
You know what? I am offended.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM OFFENSE TO PRAYER
God doesn’t exist.
[Theist makes counterarguments and prays for atheist]
Take your prayers and shove ‘em where the sun don’t shine.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM AGNOSTICISM
I don't know and you don't know either.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist
ARGUMENT FROM LOVE
Have you ever fallen in love?
[Theist answers, "of course!!"]
So what is the cause of love? Evolution is a good enough explanation for me and love is nothing but a chemical reaction in the brain, so it cannot have anything to do with God?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM IDENTITY (aka PC ARGUMENT)
Not believing in God is a central part of my identity.
You don't mean to deny my identity do you?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FORMATTING
Behold, foolish theists, I present you with an incontrovertible proof of the non-existence of God.
[Atheist posts 10,000 word document without a single paragraph break]
[Theists’ eyes implode]
I see that nobody can refute 2.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM NON-CONFRONTATION
I am not here to argue with you theists.
But come on, God obviously doesn’t exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EXODUS
If the Exodus story has any basis in historical fact, then God exists.
I haven’t seen or accepted any evidence that it is.
This means the Exodus story is false.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MARTYRDOM
The apostles definitely would have willingly died for something they knew wasn't true because they were trying to overthrow governments and gain power.
There are martyrs outside Christendom who did the same thing.
Obviously those examples prove Christian martyrdom was about gaining power.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TINKERBELL
I really want God to be fake.
If you wish for something really hard, it'll come true.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF PROOF
You can't prove God exists!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ANECDOTAL EXPERIENCE (I)
I once experienced something I can't explain.
I can come up with several possible, natural explanations which do not fit the facts, but make me feel comfortable.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ANECDOTAL EXPERIENCE (II)
I have never experienced feelings of God's presence in my mind.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM NEUROSCIENCE
Scientists say a portion of our brain may be responsible for mystical experiences.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EYEWITNESS (I)
You weren't there to witness the Creation/the Flood/the Exodus/the Crucifixion/the Resurrection/etc.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EYEWITNESS (II) (sometimes follows or combined with the previous disproof)
Someone wrote the Creation story in the Bible.
That someone obviously wasn’t an eyewitness to the described events because they are completely unbelievable (and I think there are two very different Creation accounts in Genesis 1 and 2).
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EYEWITNESS (III)
No one's ever seen God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM HALF A WING
Half of a wing may be useless, but that just means evolution is real and was working properly!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PREFERRED ANCESTRY
I don't want to be created by God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FOOLISHNESS
The bible says atheists are fools.
I don't like being called names.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FARRELL TILL
Farrell Till says God does not exist.
Therefore, God doesn't exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FARRELL TILL (II)
If God exists, he would strike Farrell Till dead.
Farrell Till is still alive.
Therefore, God doesn't exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PIG'S TEETH
Some scientists once thought a tooth was from an "ape-man."
Later scientists discovered it was a pig's tooth.
That’s how science works and it doesn’t disprove the evolution of man from "ape-men."
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PERSECUTION
Someone made fun of my atheism.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM JESUS SAID STUFF
Jesus said some stuff.
I think that a lot of the stuff he said was horrible and unloving.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PERCEIVED LACK OF DIFFERENCES
I say that the Christian God isn’t any different than the gods of other religions.
Therefore, the Christian God doesn’t exist.
THE ARGUMENT FROM CHRISTIAN IMMORALITY (although it could probably be adapted to just about any belief or non-belief)
Somewhere, someone who called himself or herself a Christian did something evil.
This person was probably not lying.
Therefore, this person was a Christian.
Therefore, Christians do evil things.
Therefore, Christians are not moral.
Christians believe in the Bible.
Therefore, the Bible is not moral.
The Bible is God's word. It says so.
Therefore, God is not moral.
(We are just ignoring all the nice things that Christians have done in the past and present, it's hard to trust history and the news anyway.)
An immoral God would be really evil.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
THE ARGUMENT FROM CRAZINESS
I would have to go crazy to believe in God.
I am not crazy.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist
ARGUMENT FROM CHOCOLATE
Some shallow theists say that chocolate is God's gift to humanity.
I hate chocolate.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PERSECUTION (II)
Jesus said that people would persecute Christians.
I say they aren’t and never have been.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WWJD
Some Christians have the "What Would Jesus Do?" T-shirt, bracelet, baseball hat, and shoelaces.
Some don’t wear them in public.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PERSECUTION (III)
You theists are mean!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INTEREST
If God really does exist then theists wouldn’t have to spend so much time talking about him.
Theists constantly talk about God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM RELIABLE SENSES
You assume that your senses are reliable even though you can’t prove it.
That means I get to assume anything I want.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INTELLECTUAL SUPERIORITY
[Atheist posts argument]
[Christian refutes argument]
Christian, you obviously didn’t understand my argument.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CATCH-PHRASE
There are no atheists in foxholes.
[Atheist points out atheists who claim to have been atheists while in foxholes]
Therefore, God doesn’t exists.
ARGUMENT FROM ARBITRARY IMPROBABILITY
We shouldn’t believe what probably isn’t true.
I have arbitrarily assigned the proposition "God exists" a probability of 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001%.
That probability came from my rear end, which I know assigns extremely accurate probabilities to propositions concerning the non-existence of God.
So God probably doesn’t exists.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FREE GIFT
If some guy came up to you on the street and offered you a billion dollars for nothing in return, would you take the money or deny his existence?
(This is an extremely poor analogy of Christ, but we’ll ignore that point.)
No one has ever offered me a billion dollars.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CHARITY
Atheists don’t build hospitals.
[Atheist points out Bill Gates and Ted Turner, who donate millions of dollars to charity]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SERIOUS ASSERTION
God doesn’t exist.
No, seriously.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM POSITIVE OUTCOME
Even if God did exist, it would be better if people believed He didn’t.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF PHYSICAL EVIDENCE
I believe that if God exists, there will be physical evidence for his existence.
There is no physical evidence for the existence of God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF EVIDENCE (II)
God, if you exist, you’ll give me a million dollars, a Playstation 2 with all the games, and a girlfriend.
[Nothing happens]
[Atheist waits and might even repeat demand]
[Nothing happens]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM IDIOCY
I am an idiot.
Even an idiot can see that God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TERRORISM (I)
Terrorists destroyed the WTC, killing thousands.
One piece of the rubble sort of looks like a cross.
God obviously was more interested in making this cross than saving lives.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TERRORISM (II)
A plane was hijacked by terrorists.
The passengers prayed and attacked the terrorists.
The plane crashed into a field, killing all aboard.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TERRORISM (III)
September 11th was really, really bad.
We have bad things happen to us all the time.
Therefore, September 11th wasn’t a punishment for something we did.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MASS MURDER
Stalin was an atheist.
He murdered millions of people.
I say that his murderousness didn’t stem from atheism.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TORNADOS
A large tornado hit Anytown, USA.
The tornado destroyed churches.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SPAGHETTI
A few people saw something weird in a bowl of spaghetti.
Some Catholics believe that it is the Virgin Mary.
They’re obviously kooks.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MONEY
All U.S. currency contains the motto "In God We Trust."
This was obviously done to force people to believe in theism.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE
The Pledge clearly states that America is "one nation, under God."
This was obviously done to force people to believe in theism.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE FOUNDING FATHERS (I)
A very small number of America's Founding Fathers wrote critically about Christianity and the Bible.
These Founding Fathers were really, really smart.
Accordingly, Christianity and the Bible must be false.
Christianity and the Bible say that God exists.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE FOUNDING FATHERS (II)
The Declaration of Independence includes the words "God" and "Creator".
This was written by a deist who didn’t believe in the Christian God!
Therefore this isn’t a Christian Nation.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PAGAN EGYPT
When the Jews came to Egypt (not that I believe they do, since the Bible is false and there is no evidence they ever did), it was a pagan nation, ruled by a pagan Pharoah.
If God really existed, the Jews would have been able to convert the entire country (except that they were never there to begin with).
The Jews obviously weren’t able to change anything because Egypt remained a pagan nation with a pagan ruler after the Exodus (which never happened).
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM STORY PLOTS
The bible has lots of books written by lots of authors over a long period of time.
Despite centuries of vigorous apologetics, theists haven’t been able to forge a coherent plot for the whole bible that I can understand.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LIKE OTHER RELIGIONS (I) (aka ARGUMENT FROM COPYCATTING aka ARGUMENT FROM STRETCHING THE TRUTH TO THE LIMIT)
The Bible said Jesus was born of a virgin, died for our sins and is the light of the world.
[Atheist takes primary figures from some other religions, stretches the truth, and makes them fit what the Bible says about Jesus.]
Therefore, the Christian God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LIKE OTHER RELIGIONS (II) (aka ARGUMENT FROM COPYCATTING II aka ARGUMENT FROM STRETCHING THE TRUTH TO THE LIMIT II)
The Bible said Jesus rose from the dead.
[Atheist takes primary figures from some other religions, stretches the truth, and makes them fit what the Bible says about Jesus.]
Therefore, the Christian God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BRUTE FORCE
[Atheist tears Jesus Fish off car, breaks it in thirds, sticks it to driver's side window.]
Therefore, Creationism is wrong.
Therefore, the theory of evolution is right.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EXODUS (II)
There is little archaeological evidence for the events in Exodus.
There is little archaeological evidence for a lot of ancient people, places and events, yet they are still accepted as fact.
But I can’t believe the Exodus actually happened.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BIBLICAL PROPHECY
The book of Daniel made some prophecies.
The prophecy was later fulfilled by other records in the Book of Daniel.
The prophecy obviously was written after the fact!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SHAME
The Bible showed a group of people performing embarassing actions.
It must be false if the book describes negative events because God would never let people he favors do those things.
The Bible isn’t describing historical events.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EQUAL VALUE (aka PC ARGUMENT II)
Evolution and the scientific worldview is a worldview. Similarly, the biblical worldview is a worldview.
You are not discriminating against our worldview are you?
The scientific worldview is as good as the biblical worldview.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MODERATION (often employed by liberals)
The Creationist side occupies an extreme side of the spectrum.
Similarly, the atheist side occupies another extreme side of the spectrum.
The liberals are in between.
Therefore, the liberal position on God is the most correct.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM JACK CHICK
I have all these stupid Jesus comics.
Those comics sure didn’t convince me!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EVIDENTIAL ASSERTION
God doesn’t exist.
Therefore all physical evidence (fossil record, etc.) must show this.
Therefore it does.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MEANNESS
If God did exist, it would be mean of him to make me believe he didn’t!
The Bible portrays God as mean.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WE ALL HAVE FAITH
We all believe things.
But belief isn’t faith.
My belief that the sun will rise tomorrow morning is very different from your faith in the existence of God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM COOLNESS
I’m really cool.
Cool people don’t believe in God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WTC (II)
Terrorists destroyed the WTC, killing thousands.
An intact Bible was found in the ruins.
No, wait, it turns out it was a dictionary.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM COLLEGE FUNDING (usable by parents only)
You don’t believe in God.
If I ever find out that you do believe in God, you won't get any money for college!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SNOWFLAKES
If God existed, he could make all snowflakes the same.
Out of 3,300 pictures of snow-crystals catalogued, no two are exactly alike.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CUSTODY
I have legal custody of our son.
If you act as though the Christian God exists, then I won't let you see him.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FIDEISM
Theists are absolutely right. There is no logical reason to disbelieve God exists.
But disbelief makes me feel good.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ENERGY
Things that exist have energy.
Energy isn’t alive.
All living things are made from energy.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM A BAD TRIP
I went to a party and took LSD.
I saw demons attacking me.
Then Jesus came and drove the demons away.
All religious experiences are obviously drug-induced hallucinations.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM STUPIDITY
I am stupid.
God made man in his own image.
There are all horrible disasters going around the world.
God is omnipotent in power.
God is too stupid to do anything about these things.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM STAR TREK
Christianity is Borg.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PRAYER
When I used to pray, I never got what I wanted (like a million dollars, a Playstation 2 with all the games, and a girlfriend).
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DEMOCRACY
God would never allow a non-Christian to become president.
There have been non-Christian presidents.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM HELL
If I don't believe God exists, I'll go to Hell.
I can’t comprehend that a loving God would send people to Hell.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MOUNTAINS
People used to think gods lived on Mt. Olympus.
We've climbed Mt. Olympus and there were no gods there.
Therefore, all gods are false.
Therefore, the Christian God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FUZZY ANIMALS (aka TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT III)
Bunnies are cute.
Perceiving cuteness is an evolutionary advantage.
Therefore, cuteness must have evolved.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM POLITICS
The vast majority of the people believe in God.
I'll get elected if I pretend to believe in God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PRESIDENTIAL INFIDELITY
If God exists and he blesses America, we’d always have moral presidents.
Clinton lied about a lot of things, including not having sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM RAIN
I was driving home when it started to rain really hard outside.
I pulled over to the side of the road and waited for the rain to let up, which it did without the need for prayer.
I arrived home safely.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM COMPUTERS
I deleted a copy of the TEN COMMANDMENTS from my computer.
If God existed, he wouldn’t have allowed this to happen.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INVISIBILITY
I can't see God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM RAIN (II) (aka ARGUMENT FROM PRAYER II)
I wanted it to be a sunny day.
I prayed it wouldn't rain.
We had two thunderstorms.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DEGREES
I Have a philosophy degree.
Your knowledge in philosophy is paltry in comparison to mine.
Therefore you are unable to comprehend my intense philosophical proofs proving God's non-existence.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ARBITRARY UNNECESSITY
I created the term "arbitrary unnecessity".
It is a golden principle and applies to whatever I say it does.
I say an eternal universe is an arbitrary unnecessity.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BEER (I)
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." - Ben Franklin
American beer is swill.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BEER (II)
Christian: Whatever you believe in is your god.
Atheist: I believe I'll have another beer.
Ha ha.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MONKEYS
If man came from monkeys, there’d still be monkeys.
There are still monkeys.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THOMAS PAINE
Thomas Paine had a lot of good arguments against Christianity... at least that’s what all my atheist friends tell me...
Thomas Paine was a great early American, too!
So anything he said must be right!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM NON-DESTRUCTION OF EVIL
I woke up this morning and found that evil still exists.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DEAD FIREFIGHTERS
Some atheist firefighters gave their lives.
For people they didn't even know!
Yes, they were TOO atheists!
I just know!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TODD BEAMER
Todd Beamer prayed "Our Father" with a switchboard operator after his flight was hijacked.
Todd Beamer died.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FALWELL
Jerry Falwell said some really stupid things after September 11th.
Then he apologized!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SCIENTISTS
Some famous scientists didn’t and don’t believe in God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FLOWERS
That flower is pretty.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM NON-INSTRUMENTATION
You are an theist.
You did something bad.
You are obviously not an instrument of God.
God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM QUANTUM PHYSICS
Quantum physics uses an uncertainty principle.
But there is no room for God in science.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THERMODYNAMICS
The Second Law of Thermodynamics says that a closed system tends to disorder.
The universe is ordered.
It did this by itself without any intervention by a higher power (like how a jar of oil, water and sand will "order itself").
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SONGS
The song "Dear God" by XTC has the line "If there's one thing I don't believe in... It's you, dear God.."
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM APOLOGETICS WEBPAGES
I was surfing the Net and came across this webpage of apologetics.
Their arguments were stupid. A monkey could refute them.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF COMFORT
All kinds of people have found no comfort in religion.
That means there isn’t anything there to give comfort to them.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ACTIVISM
Atheism is affirming this country's secular roots!
We are atheists!
We will make a big stink about this, and not let theists win!
We will win because we are right!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EXISTENTIALISIC LONELINESS
This is all there is to existence.
It's horrible, pointless, brutal and nasty.
It's depressing.
I'm lonely.
There is nothing else out there.
I mean it, there just can’t be.
THERE IS NOTHING ELSE OUT THERE!
AGGGRRG!!! THERE JUST CAN’T BE!!!!
God! He can’t be out there for me.
I'm still so lonely!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SINS I LIKE
I like X.
This isn’t just my opinion.
It is backed up with facts.
It has nothing to do with morals, but facts.
Christians say X is a sin.
But for a sin to exist and Christians to be right, God must exist.
I don’t believe X is a sin.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ATHEIST SOLIPSISM
Everything but God is real.
See #1.
ARGUMENT FROM THE THRONE ROOM
Yes, I would stand in the presence of a mighty king and demand that he prove he exists.
I don’t care if you believe that's what I’m doing with God, you arrogant jerks.
I don't CARE!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF IMAGINATION
I couldn't imagine believing in God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WOW
When I look into the sky and see all the pretty stars, all those galaxies...
Wow.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM KINDLY PSYCHOANALYSIS
You say there's a God? Ah, someone calling himself an atheist must have really hurt you in the past
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CHRISTIAN EXPERTS ARE IGNORED
Dembski, Behe and Plantinga are ignored by mainstream intellectuals.
Their work and opinions don’t prove God exists.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CHRISTIAN EXPERTS ARE NOT IGNORED
Mainstream intellectuals are paying some attention to Dembski, Behe and Plantinga.
Their work and opinions don’t prove God exists.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM COUNTERFACTUAL EVIDENCE
Christians claim the evidence for Jesus' divinity is abundant.
But even if there were lots of evidence, I would still not be convinced.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF MIRACLES (II)
Christians say that atheists wouldn't believe in God even if He showed up and performed a miracle for them.
Can you tell me why God doesn’t perform miracles for atheists?
No?
Then you must be an idiot, because God could do that for them.
But no miracles happen.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WIND
You believe in wind.
But you can't see it.
But God isn’t the same way.
I can see the effects of the wind, but not the effects of God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WARREN ROBINETT
There's a secret message in the old Atari video game "Adventure."
It reveals that the game was created by Warren Robinett.
But it’s not the same way with the world.
There are no secret messages from God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM OFFENSIVENESS
You keep making statements that I think are generalizations, hypocritical, and bigoted.
I will only agree to stay if you stop that.
[Theist tries to be non-offensive]
You're still offending me because of [insert random statement here].
[Theist rereads her posts before posting, posting when she thinks she is not being offensive].
I'm offended!
[Theist tears her hair out trying to figure out how to be non-offensive]
This conversation is just the two of us. I think we should stop this conversation.
[Theist figures 'Forget it' and posts what she really thinks]
WOW! WHAT A BIGOT! I'm leaving!
I have a victory.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MULTIPLICITY (II)
I have a large number of arguments against God.
There is a small chance that each of them is true.
Using voodoo probability calculations, this means that there is a much greater chance that all of them are true taken together!
And this ISN'T just the mathematical version of the Ontological Proof, I'm a real mathematician and you obviously can't understand this proof because you don't know as much about math as me.
Oh, and don't confuse things by mentioning how many theistic arguments there are, and the probability of each of them being correct...
Or the fact that I basically pulled the probability of each of my arguments being correct out of my rear end...
And admit that I know more about math than you, and you'll see that...
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCES
One time, I was in deep emotional pain.
I prayed to God and nothing happened.
You aren't going to deny my emotional pain, are you?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ABUSING THE BODY
One time, I fasted for three days straight, prayed on my knees for hours, and didn't sleep, either.
At the end of that time, God never answered me.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ECSTASY
I woke up last night with a feeling of indescribable pleasure and joy.
It was most likely sexual.
So the ecstasy couldn’t have come from God because God hates sex.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FORMALIZED PANHANDLING
I don't want to work for a living.
I don't want to pay taxes.
I can get gullible fundamentalist atheists to send me money.
I can use exemption claims to tie the IRS up in court.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist!
ARGUMENT FROM NOT FEELING LOVE ALL AROUND
I don’t feel love all around me. I know the world is a cruel place, that people are uncaring, and that that comes from evolved human behavior.
I don't know how I know. It’s not backed up by anything. It's just there.
I don't know how I know. Stop pestering me!
[Cries until theist goes away]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MUSIC (could also be used for art)
I like classical music.
Classical composers said they wrote for God.
But they had to compose for the Church or they would have been executed.
So they weren’t actually writing for God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SADISM (I)
Some people claiming to be Christians enjoy beating children.
They claim that there is some justification for it in the Bible.
I believe them.
I claim that they represent the whole of Christianity.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SADISM (II)
Some claiming to be Christians enjoy treating women like dirt. It makes them feel powerful.
They claim that there is some justification for it in the Bible.
I believe them.
I claim that they represent the whole of Christianity.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE BIBLE (II)
The Bible says the Bible is true.
This is a circular argument.
Therefore the Bible is false.
The Bible says God exists.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BENEFIT OF THE DOUBT
We should give people the benefit of the doubt.
When someone says God doesn’t exist, we should believe them.
A lot of people say God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ANTI-PASCAL'S ARGUMENT
If God exists, it would really suck.
If God didn't exist, it would be really cool.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
THE BIBLICAL ALTERATION ARGUMENT
The Bible has been deliberately changed since it was written.
Therefore everything in it must be false.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
BIBLICAL PROPHECIES ARGUMENT
Jesus clearly did not fulfill all the prophecies of the Jews.
That's why there are still Jews today.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
THE LACK OF STEWARDSHIP ARGUMENT (aka THE ENVIRONMENTALIST’S ARGUMENT)
The Bible says that God gave us the earth to take care of it.
We don’t take care of it.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE 2nd LAW OF THERMODYNAMICS
All systems become chaotic.
The Universe, too, will become chaotic.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM IPUs
Invisible pink unicorns don't exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE MEANING OF LIFE
What's the meaning of life?
[Theist gives their answer]
That's not what I believe.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LOGIC
There are some things in logic that you can't logically demonstrate.
Therefore you have to take them on faith.
But faith in logic is not the same as faith in God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM VENUS
If you twist the details enough, you can make a case for Venus, as a comet, causing the Biblical catastrophes.
Therefore the Bible is false.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CAN'T-BE-A-RACIST
Hubert Henry Harrison, A. Philip Randolph, J. A. Rogers, George S. Schuyler, John G. Jackson, John Henrik Clarke, Yosef ben-Jochannan, Bobby E. Wright, John Ragland, James Forman, Deborah Clark, James Baldwin, W. E. B. DuBois, Richard Wright, and Gregory Gross are all famous black people who didn’t believe in God.
I don't think you want to say black people are fools?
That's what I thought.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM JESUS’ TORTURE (aka ARGUMENT FROM SUFFERING)
Christians say that no one ever, ever suffered as much as Jesus did on the cross.
But what about victims of the Inquisition?
What about the women burned at the stake or hanged as witches?
What about all the people who died thinking they were going to Hell?
If God were all good, He wouldn’t let anyone suffer like that.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SEVERABILITY
Lots of ridiculous statements are made by people who claim to be Real Christians.
They just give Real Christians a bad name.
Real Christians don't believe the Bible is literally true.
That means the Bible isn't true.
And the Bible isn’t the Word of God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BECAUSE
Because.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ELABORATED ARGUMENT FROM BECAUSE
Because.
Because why?
Because!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM "LET'S JUST NOT BELIEVE"
All belief systems should be treated the same as the scientific one.
[Theist: Why?]
Because they have their own grounds.
Anyway, that's my experience of how the world works.
[Theist: It's not mine. And why should you treat claims of UFOs and aliens more seriously than claims of God’s existence?]
I believe there are UFOs and aliens.
But I don’t believe in God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM UNIQUE EXISTENCE
God may exist, but not in a way that anything else that exists exists.
Since there are no other things that exist as God may exist, we are free to make up things about God's state of existence that ensure his continued non-observability
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM NEGATIVE RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE
More people have had negative religious experiences in the context of Western theism.
Therefore, God is cruel, unjust and unloving.
[Theist: What about the people who have had positive experiences? Or experiences of God's existence?]
They don't count.
Therefore, God is just the way I describe Him to be.
Oh, yeah. And God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM RIGHTS
The Constitution is the the basis of U.S. law.
Therefore, the Declaration of Independence is meaningless.
The Constitution created our rights.
The DoI is wrong in saying that our rights come from God.
You have rights, don't you?
Well where do you think they came from?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FUTURE EVIDENCE
It doesn't seem to make sense that there would logically be a God.
I know He's not real, and that in the future I think that maybe something will happen probably that will show you all that He isn’t.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM POSTULATE
To fully understand the following demonstration, you must first assume that God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM POOR TYPING SKILLS
In tihs essae ill demnstrate that gOd deosnt exsits in a way tat's so sure thatno thesit can PSOosibly reftue. J will firts dwmonsrtate waht we canaSSUme fo rGod nonexisnce,,then how wwe can refute anya rgument wihch pretends teh contrrary to eb true,tehn wel'l expose scinetific evidnece thatGod dosen’t eeexists then we'll cnolcude. yOU will fnid an acurate&up6to6date bibliography no teh page 43 of tihs essay;i Sugegst yu to pritn iths doculent for a mroe confortable raeding.
[Theist doesn't bother to read it]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM UNTRANSLATED OLD NON-ENGLISH LANGUAGE
[Atheist quotes paragraph from a historic European non-believer in that person’s original language and does not bother to provide a translation]
How could you possibly refute that?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CLEVER USE OF VOCABULARY
Many theists will not be convinced by an argument with "Therefore, God doesn’t exist" as its conclusion.
Consequently, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM IGNORANCE
I don't understand Creationism; I mean how could God create the universe?
(Well informed theist gives articulate explanation of Creationism and gently explains that evolution is a crock.)
Well it seems way too complicated and unlikely to me. Plus I don't want to live my life thinking I was created by some imaginary sky-daddy.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist and Jesus is a myth.
(Theist argues that atheist's ignorance of Creationism does not logically lead to the conclusion that there is no God.)
Says you! Get bent.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CHURCH
Lots of people don’t go to church.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PHOTO-OP (ARGUMENT FROM THE PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE II)
A couple of federal judges ruled in 2002 that the Pledge was unconstitutional because it states "one nation, under God.
Almost immediately thereafter, the whole U.S. Senate recited the Pledge, including "under God," in the Capitol.
The Senators' conduct was just a bunch of political posturing and/or vote whoring.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DEFENESTRATION
If God exists, then He’d protect you if I pushed you out this third story window.
[Christian tries to explain the fallacy of that position]
*shove*
See! God didn't protect you, just like I predicted! Any counterarguments, Christian?
No?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MUSHROOMS
This pizza tastes funny.
That purple llama on the ceiling is juggling chainsaws.
Purple llamas can't juggle chainsaws.
It must be evolution!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MYTHOLOGY (aka ARGUMENT FROM COPYCATTING III)
The Old Religions were the source of stories in the Bible.
The Old Religions were all false.
Therefore, I must be right.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ACCUSATION
God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, YOU know that God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM NOT-BELIEVING
The New Testament says unbelievers would question Christians.
Hardly any do.
Therefore the bible is false.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BANANAS
Bananas have many characteristics that make them attractive as primate food.
They're so good that they must have evolved along with primates.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM METEORS (aka ARGUMENT FROM FALWELL)
I think that Jerry Falwell believes that God hates gay people (though he has said otherwise, but he is lying).
God listens to everything Jerry Falwell says.
Disney World held a Gay Day parade.
God could punish Disney World by sending hurricanes, earthquakes, and possibly a meteor to Florida.
God didn't, thus disproving both postulate 1 and 2.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM COAL MINERS
A bunch of miners got trapped.
A bunch of people worked around the clock for a week to rescue them.
If God existed, He could have just teleported them out of the mine.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TEENAGE ATHEIST SKATEBOARD RATS
God is bogus!
Like, totally, dude!
Therefore, God, like, doesn’t exist and stuff.
ARGUMENT FROM PERSONAL INABILITY
The Bible says believers will be able to perform miracles greater than Jesus.
Can you at least turn water into wine or, better yet, beer?
No? Well there ya go.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PERSONAL ABILITY
I lifted a car off my trapped puppy.
I did that without God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DIVINE OPPOSITION
Satan is good.
I’d rather be on Satan's side. At least I will be able to drink myself into a stupor, smoke pot, gamble, watch porn, swear, have promiscuous sex, etc.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DIVINE OPPOSITION AS USED BY A TEENAGE ATHEIST SKATEBOARD RATS
Satan is really cool, dude.
You really wanna, like, be like Satan, right dude?
Therefore God, like, doesn’t exist and stuff. Totally.
ARGUMENT FROM BUFFALO (aka TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT IV)
The Indians used every part of the buffalo.
Creation is insufficient to explain why they could do this.
It had to have evolved!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DENTAL OPPORTUNITY
Bite me.
Therefore, God doesn’t exists.
ARGUMENT FROM DENTAL OPPORTUNITY, ACCEPTED
Bite me.
OW! YOU BIT ME!
I'm being persecuted!!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist!
ARGUMENT FROM NEW AGEYNESS
If enough people just don’t believe, God won’t exist.
Lots of people have been unbelieving for a very long time.
Therefore, surely by NOW, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ROUNDNESS (aka TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT V)
Isn't it amazing how perfectly round the planets are?
Gravity made this happen.
[Theist: Yes, and?]
Gravity, not God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist!
ARGUMENT FROM HIDDEN FAITH
The sun will rise tomorrow.
I have no doubt about it.
No, I can’t prove it.
It just will.
Faith? No. I have science, so I don’t need faith.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM IMPLIED UGLINESS (aka TELEOLOGICAL ARGUMENT VI)
If you were created by God, you'd be beautiful.
But look how ugly you are, and the world that is around you.
God would have never made you or the world so ugly.
I don't care if ugliness is totally subjective!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BRAINWASHING
Christians claim that we have been brainwashed by secular colleges & universities in their futile thinking, and by secular reasoning.
We can just as easily say that Christians have been brainwashed by churches and the clergy.
Their brainwashing keeps them from the truth, rationality and freethought.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM COMMUNISM
All communists weren’t bad. Haven’t you read history?
All communists were atheists.
Therefore they were right.
Since atheists are more moral than Christians, they are good.
Therefore they are right.
This argument does so make sense!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM GOOD AND BAD BEHAVIOR
Sometimes I do good things and sometimes I do bad things.
When I do something good, it is because I choose to.
God has nothing to do with it.
When I do something bad, it is because I choose to.
The Devil has nothing to do with it.
Whatever I do, it proves that neither God nor the Devil is real.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BEER (II)
Real men like beer.
God didn’t make beer and Jesus only made wine.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TAXATION
Churches don't pay taxes.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PLANS FOR THE WORLD
There is no plan for the world.
The non-existence of a plan can be seen from the fact that things are the way they are.
My non-belief is not part of any plan, and neither is your belief.
[Theist: Why not?]
This is too complex for your mind to comprehend.
Just accept that there is no plan for the world.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM HIT-AND-RUN
[Atheist creates message board account and logs in]
"GOD IS FONEY AND ALL U STOOPID THEIST MOREONS WILL ROT IN JAIL MARK MY WERDS!!!!!!!!@#3FD"
[Atheist logs off and never returns]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PECULIARITY
Evolution made us peculiar people.
Stop laughing, foul believer.
In order to preserve our own particular peculiarity---
Stop laughing, I said.
We must be a people apart.
This means not listening to anyone who believes differently than we do, because this would taint our peculiarity.
If you do not stop laughing---
(Oh, I have to do the end of the argument).
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
And God especially doesn’t exist because believers are laughing at us, which means we're persecuted, which means we're special.
Therefore, (once again) God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENTUM FROM TINKERTOYS
Take some tinkertoys and make several "creations".
Add and/or subtract pieces from the creations.
Repeat as many times as you wish.
The tinkertoys are evolving.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM HOSPITAL (aka ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF MIRACLES II)
A dear relative of mine was terminally ill and undergoing extensive surgery in the hospital.
My whole family sat outside the OR and prayed through the entire eight hours of surgery.
He died.
The doctors said there was nothing they could do to save him.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WEIRD
You look weird, theist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ALIENS
I was once abducted by aliens.
The Bible doesn’t say anything about aliens.
If aliens exist, then God doesn’t.
You've seen the X-files, haven't you?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LACK OF REVELATION
God should be able to tell me He exists.
I don’t hear God telling me anything.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FORCE
[Argument from theist]
[Atheist shoots theist]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM NAZIISM
Hitler was trying to establish a Christian theocracy.
Therefore, Hitler was a theist.
Hitler was the worst leader possible.
Therefore, all theists are bad people.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM UNCONSCIOUS ATHEISM
Theists think God created life.
Well, they shouldn’t if they thought about it really, really hard.
Evolution is enough to explain the creation of life.
So theists shouldn’t believe in God, if they weren't so dumb.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM COMMUNICATION FROM GOD
I had this incredible experience that I attest to natural causes stemming from evolution.
[Theist says, "Couldn't there be a message from God?"]
No, I'm telling you this could be only be explained naturally.
[Theist suggests alternate explanations q,r,s,t,u,v,w,x,y and z which all involve God.]
No, none of those can explain it.
Because they can't!
[Theist is not convinced.]
How dare you deny my special experience!
[Theist tries to explain that s/he's only questioning the atheist's interpretation of that experience, and not the claim that something special was experienced.]
You just don't want to believe that what I experienced wasn’t from God, because you are a closed-minded, dogmatic theist!
And also, you are a big meanie and I'm not talking to you anymore!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM COLTRANE
John Coltrane's "A Love Supreme" is dedicated to God.
John Coltrane's "A Love Supreme" is full of passion.
John Coltrane, like every other theist, is full of it.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM GEORGE HARRISON
George Harrison wrote "My Sweet Lord," a song about finding God.
George Harrison is dead.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE POPE
The pope believes in God.
The pope, like every other theist, is full of it.
I hate the pope.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM GAME THEORY
Atheist: [after lengthy explanation] Hence, pursuant to game theory, non-belief in an afterlife is the most sensible option.
Theist: Wait a minute. That's just a modified Pascal's Wager.
Aheist: Nuh uh!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MARSHALL BRAIN
Here are some Bible passages.
I interpret these passages differently than Christians do.
My interpretations don't make sense.
Therefore, God does not exist.
"FALSE BECAUSE IT IS INCONSISTENT" ARGUMENT
If the Bible authors were truly inspired by God, it would have been perfect and seamless and without any apparent inconsistencies.
But the Bible is inconsistent, erroneous, and plain goofy at many places
So the Bible is NOT a product of your sky-daddy and is without question the product of some smooth-talking manipulative authors.
Hence the Bible isn’t the word of God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BUZZWORDS
As game theory clearly shows, the complex nature of the universe indicates probabilistic fine-tuning at the quantum level and renders God logically unnecessary.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THINGS HURT (I)
Things hurt.
Theists say that God takes away all our hurt.
They really are stupid, aren't they?
Atheists are smarter than that.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THINGS HURT (II)
Some things hurt a lot.
Theists say that God takes away all our hurt.
But since they can't derive "ought" from "is," their belief presupposes the non-existence of God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
EXISTENTIAL ARGUMENT FROM EVIL (aka ARGUMENT FROM POWER)
I have a gun.
[Theist: "Ouch!!!"]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM RELIGIOUS DIVERSITY
The difference in religions disproves God's existence.
Everyone knows and understands this.
Well, everyone who matters, anyway.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM RELIGIOUS LANGUAGE
God doesn’t exist.
Therefore, when I talk about God or related concepts, these words denote something.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EVOLUTION
Science is always true.
Science says that there is a vanishingly small chance that all of this could have happened on its own.
But it obviously did happen on its own no matter how small the chance because we’re here now talking about it.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SCIENCE
Science is always true.
Therefore there is no room for religious faith.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THINGS HURT (III)
Things hurt.
Theists claim that things hurting are part of God's plan.
They also claim that a lot of the good things in life only come through suffering.
This is a load of hogwash since an all-good, all-loving God would not allow pain and suffering.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM GUNS (II)
We have a gun.
In fact, we have a lot more guns than you do.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MONTY PYTHON
Graham Chapman appeared in a film that made fun of Jesus.
Graham Chapman died of a horrible, incurable disease.
I can’t believe in a God that doesn’t have a sense of humor about himself.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WAR
War is worse than Hell.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ELVIS
Some people call Jesus "the King."
But we know Elvis was the only "King."
Even believers can have a glimpse of wisdom.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
LINGUAL ARGUMENT
Some people claim that there's existence in nonexistence.
Some of those people are theists.
But I am going to apply that silly argument to the whole of theism.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
THE CIRCULAR DIVINE POWER ARGUMENT
If God exists, then His existence must be the work of God.
This is a circular argument that I pulled out of my nether regions. It has no basis in logic or reality.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM OPPRESSION (related to the various ARGUMENTS FROM OFFENSIVENESS)
God doesn’t exists.
[Theist asks any one of various questions, or even just starts to ask them]
Are you saying that God does exist?
You're oppressing me! You're depriving me of the right to disbelieve in God if I want to!
Oppression is bad.
Therefore, you are bad.
Therefore, you must be wrong.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WHEAT
A grain of wheat will always fall to the ground and the outer shell "dies".
But see, eventually the grain will grow into a fuller, more vital form.
Hey, that's evolution for ya!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WARM & FUZZY THINGS
When I was a theist, I didn't have any warm & fuzzy things in my life.
I really like warm & fuzzy things.
If the Judeo-Christian God exists, He would’ve made sure I go lots of warm & fuzzy things to make me happy.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SCIENCE (II)
Everything was fine until man created theism to take the place of science.
Science is still alive and well.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM AMERICA
God bless America?
How did God bless America on 9/11?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MASSIVE OPIATES
Got to keep the public distracted.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM KING JOSIAH
No time to expand the kingdom.
Therefore God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM THE ACLU
I say God doesn’t exist.
I could sue you and have you locked up, you know.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM IT'S MY BALL AND YOU CAN'T PLAY
There is abundant logical and empirical evidence that God does not exist.
There is no evidence that God does exist.
I know because I play by a different set of rules.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DISCOMFORT
I am happy not believing in God.
Then you come along and say all this nasty stuff to take my happiness away.
*sniff*... *sniff*... why are you making me uncomfortable?
Anyone who makes other people uncomfortable must be different. And bad. And ignorant.
Daddy will hug me!
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ARTIFACT
Archeologists have never found the remains of some places and events mentioned in the Bible.
So the Bible is false.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist
What? "Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence?" That only applies to things that disprove God. Stop trying to use that against us!
ARGUMENT FROM LITTLE BABIES (I)
Sometimes a bad person hurts little babies because he doesn't have a happy life.
An all-good, all-loving God wouldn’t let this happen.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM LITTLE BABIES (II)
Sometimes little babies are different from one another - how could you explain that?! Like, one will be really happy, and another will be sad. Sometimes even twins.
This proves evolution.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM A VIDEO I WATCHED WITH MY DAD
Me and my dad watched this video about evolution.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WHAT YEAR IT IS
The years of our calendar traditionally have been dated from the birth of Christ.
But now we’ve got a "new" system of dating called the "Common Era" system.
Basically, all it does is use the same reckoning (i.e. from the birth of Christ), but we’ve changed the designations from "B.C." and "A.D." to a more atheist-pleasing "B.C.E." and "C.E." That way, we don’t have to acknowledge that the birth of Christ was a significant or even an actual event in history.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM EARTH-CENTRISM
A few hundred years ago, people thought that everything in the universe revolved around the earth.
Some of those people were theists, but they were taking their cues from the scientists of the time.
I’ll just ignore that last part and blame it on the theists.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM UNKNOWN QUALITIES
Theists claim that God has qualities we mere humans can't possibly know.
If we can’t know them, then how can we know He even exists?
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FORGIVING MISGUIDEDNESS
Atheist: X, Y, and Z all prove God is cruel and evil in the Bible and that He doesn’t exist.
Theist: But I can refute X, Y, Z and unsaid arguments A, B, and C...
Atheist: Don't worry, you're wrong and your questioning my arguments just proves how stupid and arrogant you are.
Theist: But you haven't said anything rational.
Atheist: God is a lie. Duh.
Therefore God doesn’t exist.
Repeat 4, [3|5] ad infinitum.
ARGUMENT FROM NOT FEELING GOD'S PRESENCE
Theists always say they can feel God's presence.
If God existed, He could use his omnipotence to make everyone feel his presence.
I’ve never felt God's presence.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WILLFUL IGNORANCE
It simply doesn't make sense that an unseen, all-knowing, all-powerful, all-good sky-daddy created the world out of nothingness, from magic, essentially, and then punished us for eating a piece of fruit, and then incarnated himself in human flesh and came down to shed his own blood so he could break his own rules, and then went through hell on a temporary basis and then went back into the sky and promised to come back and take everyone who believed in him to this heaven no one has ever seen?
Don’t bother trying to explain it to me or tell me how I’ve falsely portrayed God. I like being an atheist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM WILLFUL IGNORANCE, ADDENDUM
Theist: Yes, it does.
Atheist: See, you're confusing the issue again! Think Simple and Sensible!
Therefore, doesn’t God exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SCIENTIFIC AMERICAN
Scientific American published an article that shows creationism is nonsense.
Theists argue that the first editor of Scientific American was a Christian.
Thankfully, things have changed for the better.
Christians shouldn’t have anything to do with science or scientific publications.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SCIENTIFIC AMERICAN (II)
A creation ministry copied and replied to the full text of an article from Scientific American.
SA sent only one email to that ministry saying that they don't necessarily want their articles distributed for free in the internet by just anyone.
The ministry was obviously in the wrong even though SA can’t prove that the article wasn’t used under the rules of "fair use."
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM PEPPERED MOTHS
Science textbooks rightly use the "peppered moths" to prove evolution.
Theists say that peppered moths prove creationism.
Obviously theists have no clue what they’re talking about.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM RADIO SIGNALS
There are many radio signals floating around our heads all the time.
God could use them to communicate to us.
I haven’t heard from God.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM INDIA
[Non-believer asks if the theist would still call his religious experiences Christian if he had been raised in another country]
[Theists questions the validity of "what if" arguments]
[Non-believer takes that as proof that the theist is "full of it"]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BESTSELLERDOM
The Bible is the best-selling work in history.
Just because it's popular doesn't mean it's the Word of God.
And there's plenty of evidence to suggest it's not.
[Sound of theist squirting milk out his nose]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
MODIFIED TRILEMMA ARGUMENT
Jesus was either Lord, liar, or lunatic.
He was obviously one or both of the latter two, but I can’t prove it.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ANARCHY
There is no objective truth to the universe.
If there were, we wouldn’t have to be constantly fighting against anarchy.
We wouldn’t need courts or governments or anything.
[Theist falls out of her chair from laughing so hard]
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DIVINE RIGHT
God saves the king/queen.
There have been several kings/queens who have died.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM SQUARE CIRCLES
I flippantly say that I can conceive of a square circle, though I can’t possibly even begin to describe what it would look like.
Obviously God can’t make a square circle, or they would exist.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist
ARGUMENT FROM DICTATORSHIP
Many dictators claimed to be following God.
Dictators are wrong.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM TERROR
The lightning storm filled me with the terror.
God is obviously cruel and evil.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MEANING
God is not needed for things to have meaning.
I mean...
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM QUALITY OF LIFE
Quite simply, the non-theist life is better than the theist life.
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM GAME SHOWS
I have 55 contradictions I found in the Bible, and you have 15 seconds to answer them.
(Theme from "Jeapardy" plays in the background)
AAHHHHHH... Time's up. So sorry; there are no parting gifts.
Therefore God doesn't exist.
ARGUMENT FROM RIDICULOUS COMPARISON
Some people believe that God exists.
Some people believe that Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny exist.
Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny do not exist.
Therefore, God does not exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CONTRAST
Theists believe that God is supernatural and always existed.
"Supernatural" contrasts "natural".
Therefore, nothing that is "supernatural" can exist unless something which is "natural" exists at the same time.
Things that are natural didn't exist until the universe began to exist
Therefore, that which is supernatural could not have always existed
Therefore, God does not exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MEASUREMENTS
Theists say that God is everywhere.
If God was everywhere, our instruments that measure things would show that he's there.
They don't.
Therefore, God does not exist
ARGUMENT FROM NIETZSCHE or ARGUMENT FROM THE FASIONABILITY OF QUOTING NIETZSCHE
Nietzsche says God is dead.
Anyone who says that God is dead must be highly intelligent.
Anyone who is highly intelligent can be trusted to make only true statements.
Therefore Nietzsche was smart and was speaking the truth when he said that God is dead.
Therefore God is dead (ie God does not exist).
ARGUMENT FROM MARX
Marx says that religion is the opium of the masses.
If I'm seen reading a copy of the Communist Manifesto, it'll make me look like an intellectual.
Therefore God doesn't exist.
ARGUMENT FROM FREUD
Freud says that God is just wish-fulfillment.
Any intangible concept that I wish for, other than good weather, good grades, happiness, love, respect and friendship, cannot exist.
Therefore God doesn't exist.
ARGUMENT FROM DESPERATION
If there is any possibility, even one in a billion billion billion, that the universe could exist without God's help, then that's exactly what happened.
Therefore, God does not exist.
ARGUMENT FROM MAJORITY RULES
God must not exist, since the majority of people on Earth aren't Christians.
Theist - "But the majority of the people on Earth DO believe in God, so, by your logic, God DOES exist."
So? Are you saying that the majority of people believing something automatically makes it true?
Theist - "Ummm...no..."
Therefore, God does not exist.
ARGUMENT FROM ASSUMPTION
Therefore, God doesn’t exist.
ARGUMENT FROM CONFUSION
Your Bible says God is not the author of confusion.
I get confused all the time.
Therefore, God does not exist.
ARGUMENT FROM BLISS
Ignorance is bliss.
Theists seem pretty happy a lot of the time
Therefore, theists are ignorant.
Therefore, God does not exist.
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You may be a fundamentalist atheist if....
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An amusing little list in the tradition of Jeff Foxworthy's "You Just Might be a Redneck if..." was sent to us by a reader and we have expanded it since. See how many of these you can apply to people you know!
Notice as of March 2003: To keep the list better organized and help readers spot new material, we will highlight new additions over the current two years in color. Recent add-ons are coded as follows: 2005 in red. 2006 in blue.
Existence of God
You may be a fundy atheist if....
You became an atheist when you were 10 years old, based on ideas of God that you learned in Sunday School. Your ideas about God haven't changed since.
You think that the primary aim of an omnibenevolent God is for people to have FUN.
You believe that extra drippy ice-cream is a logical proof against the existence of God, because an omniscient God would know how to stop the ice-cream from being extra drippy, an omnipotent God would have the ability to stop the ice-cream from being extra drippy, and by golly, an omnibenevolent God wouldn't want your ice-cream to be extra drippy.
Although you've memorized a half a dozen proofs that He doesn't exist, you still think you're God's gift to the ignorant masses.
You believe the astronomical size of the universe somehow disproves God, as if God needed a tiny universe in order to exist.
You think questions like, "Can God create a rock so big that He cannot lift it?" and, "Can God will Himself out of existence?" are perfect examples of how to disprove God's omnipotence and ultimately how to disprove God. When someone proves to you the false logic behind the questions (i.e. pitting God's omnipotence against itself), you desperately try to defend the questions, but then give up and go to a different Christian site to ask them.
Related to the above, you spend a great deal of your spare time writing to Christian websites asking them these very questions.
You declare on a public forum that you are "furious at God for not existing."
You spend hours arguing that a-theism actually means "without a belief in God " and not just " belief that there is no god" as if this is a meaningful distinction in real life.
You consistently deny the existence of God because you personally have never seen him but you reject out of hand personal testimony from theists who claim to have experienced God as a reality in their lives.
You can make the existence of pink unicorns the center-piece of a philosophical critique.
You insist that "the burden of proof is on he that alleges/accuses", and "it's impossible to prove a negative", then state "That's what Christians do. They lie. Their most common lie is that they were once atheists." When reminded about the burden of proof bit, you reply with, "Well, prove Christians don't lie!"
You adamantly believe that the "God of the gaps" idea is an essential tenet of orthodox Christian faith espoused by all the great Christian thinkers throughout history.
When you were a child, someone came down with a deadly disease and prayed and prayed for God to take it away. God did not remove the disease and your friend died. You ask other Christians why they had to die when they were such a nice person and never harmed anyone. Dissatisfied with their answers, you suddenly decide that there is no God and that all Christians are nothing but lying, conniving con artists and hypocrites....all that is except for your friend who died.
You call a view held by less than ten percent of the American public "common sense".
You're a spoiled fifteen year old boy who lives in the suburbs and you go into a chat room to declare that, "I know there is no God because no loving God would allow anyone to suffer as much as I...hold on. My cell phone's ringing."
You attack your fellow atheists, who hold the "belief that there is no god", calling them "liars," and state that, "I do not deny the existence of any god. I just don't believe in any." Then you tell someone that their God is "made up." When someone calls you on this, you state, "I never made such a claim."
Going with the definition of "without a belief in God", you insist that all people are born atheists, and that dogs, cats, rocks, and trees are as well. You make statements like, "My dog is an atheist. Ask him about his lack of belief."
You believe that if something cannot be touched, seen, heard, or measured in some way, then it must not exist, yet you fail to see the irony of your calling Christians "narrow-minded".
You say that there is no God and that those who believe in God do so in blind faith, yet your claim that there is no God also rests on blind faith.
While you don't believe in God, you feel justified on bashing God or attacking those who believe in something that you KNOW doesn't exist, fighting against or even discussing about a non-existent being are the symptoms of mental illness!
You complain when Christians appeal to their emotions when justifying their belief in God yet you feel justified on appealing to your emotions for lack of belief in God.
You blame God for the starvation, sickness, pain and suffering in the world...when, indeed, it is MAN's greed, politics, selfishness and apathy that not only causes, but also ignores the sick and the starving masses. We aren't our brothers' keepers....but we should be.
Origins
You may be a fundy atheist if....
You believe that planes, computers, calculators, compasses, etc, were "all obviously designed," yet the human body, being intricately more complex was "obviously a product of biological evolution." It seems the more complex the apparatus, the more obvious the "fact" that it was not designed.
You claim that evolution and the big bang are two entirely separate theories that explain different aspects of the universe, yet, in what school of learning can you find any real separation or distinction between the two?
As a member of the Skeptic's Society you pride yourself on being skeptical of extraordinary claims. You also pride yourself on silencing everyone who is skeptical of the extraordinary claims of evolution.
Isaac Newton does not count as an example of a great scientist who believed in the Bible since he died before the Origin of Species was published.
When you watch a punt returner run a 93 yard touchdown, you marvel at what evolution has done for the human race. But when someone gets cancer, you blame God for it.
When you're discussing the origin of the world, the phrase "uncaused cause(God)" is a stupid, meaningless thing to say. You will, however, settle for "uncaused effect(the world without God)".
You descended from apes.(Think about it.)
You think that humans are products of chance but when it comes to human reason we can believe in logic! (Think about it !)
You think you arrived at your position because you are a free-thinker who rationally weighed the evidence, and then freely chose atheism over theism. YET, you also believe that your thinking and actions are nothing more than the FIXED reactions of the atoms in your brain that are governed by the Laws of Chemistry and Physics.
You love to castigate Christians for being "anti-science" if they deny evolution from goo to you via the zoo, and to preach that they should adapt their thinking to the "science" of our day. But you also castigate the Church of 400 years ago for being anti-science, when it DID adapt its thinking to the science of ITS day, i.e. Ptolemaic cosmology, then joined with the Aristotelian scientists of the universities in rejecting Galileo!
You think that some guy named "Dr Dino" with no scientific credentials represents mainstream Evangelical thinking and scholarship about evolution and creation, and thus by spending inordinate amounts of time attacking him you are somehow dismantling the arguments of scholarly dissenters from evolution, creationists with earned Ph. D.s in science, and of advocates of intelligent design.
You claim poker-faced that "social Darwinism" and its spawn of eugenics have absolutely no connection to the biological theories propounded by Charles Darwin in "On The Origin of Species by Means of Natural Selection, or The Preservation of Favoured Races in the Struggle for Life"
You have recently stuck a Darwin fish on your car in the hopes the people with the Jesus fish on theirs will be offended.
You also claim that not only is there no connection between Darwin's theories and the doctrines of social Darwinism and eugenics (despite the fact that the term eugenics was coined and advocated by Darwin's cousin Francis Galton, who acknowledged his debt to Origin), but that none of these philosophical positions have any connection to the modern fields of sociobiology and evolutionary psychology.
You can claim with as straight face on sites like Talk Origins that "Evolution does not have moral consequences" despite the fact that prominent evolutionary advocates like Richard Dawkins and Daniel Dennett vehemently assert that evolution does transcend biology in a way that has a profound effects upon ethics.
When the Pope says that God may have used evolution, he is an enlightened religious leader whom Christians should listen to. When the Pope preaches on the sanctity of human life from conception, and thus denounces abortion, he's just a senile religious bigot who should keep his opinions to himself.
Concerning the origins of life, you feel that though the chances of life forming without an intelligent creator are small it DID indeed happen that way. And yet you don't believe me when a rock, coming from my direction, hits you in the back of the head and I tell you, "I didn't throw it. There was a sudden shift in the earth's gravitational pull and the rock levitated into your head...Sure the chances are small but it DID happen that way."
When you're shown that your view of origins is silly, you can only respond, "Well...at least it's better than believing in some invisible SKY DADDY!"
When a Christian points out the impossibility of a biological system (or feature) forming by pure chance you accuse them of invoking a "God of the gaps". YET, when you are asked how a particular feature could come about solely by chance you invoke "Evolution of the gaps" (i.e., we don't know HOW but we do know that Evolution MUST have done it!)
You claim antibiotic-resistant bacteria is proof protozoa evolved into a person.
You insist that science is completely partial to all ideas, is not dogmatic and researches all possibilities -- except creationism and/or intelligent design.
You claim Creationists don't research on evolution websites before debating against it. Luckily you caught this useful weapon against Christians at the evolution site you learned all about creation doctrine from.
You think that every scientist who believes in Creationism and doesn't mindlessly accept evolution as a fact is a "kook," but you believe that Francis Crick (Nobel Prize winning co-discoverer of DNA), who reached into his nether regions and pulled out the "theory" of Directed Panspermia (which states with absolutely no support that aliens seeded the earth with life - see the movie "Mission to Mars"), is a great evolutionist scientist.
When a creationist points out problems with the evolutionist model you claim that the whole point of science is to answer problems like these. But if you can point out even one problem in the creationist model it should instantly be abandoned as absurd.
You are a person who absolutely believes that life came from nonlife, yet absolutely deny the possibility of anyone rising from the dead.
You won't bet $10 on the football game because a 50/50 chance isn't good enough, but you have no problem gambling with your life on the nearly impossible odds of a cell randomly generating from nothing.
Engaging the "slippery slope" fallacy, you think you can invalidate the whole bible by discrediting Genesis, since 'the whole bible either stands together or falls apart'. However, when a Creationist tries to invalidate the whole doctrine of naturalistic evolution by exposing the sheer improbability and lack of evidence of abiogenesis, you note this point as 'irrelevant'.
You think the movie "Inherit the Wind" best describes the eternal struggle of how an evolutionist is being treated by creationists in this religious society. And you can personally relate your life to the Scopes Monkey Trial.
You ignore "Time Magazine's" poll, which states that only 28% of Americans believe in evolution. But of course, "Time Magazine" must been run by creationists.
You teach a belief only held by 28% of a nation, as truth beyond any shadow of a doubt because only educated people believe in evolution. Yet of course, you ignore that fully educated scientists in most other nations have proven against Darwinian theory. Like the Chinese paleontologist who reportedly says: "In China we can criticize Darwin but not the government. In America you can criticize the government but not Darwin."
You think man evolved from monkeys but get mad when somebody calls you one.
You think that if schools teach the Intelligent Design theory of creation,they should also teach the "stork theory" of where babies come from.
You demand that Christians study advanced evolutionary biology before making claims about natural selection. You then claim that their theological ideas, which you have never examined before, are pure nonsense.
On the other hand, you demand that Christians who have NOT studied evolutionary biology ought to go ahead and publicly commit to arguments about it, because you want to trap or embarrass them with your own knowledge of the subject, which is limited to quoting Gould and Futuyama.
You claim that the 'God' mentioned by Albert Einstein and Steven Hawkings is nature and that they were atheists, then claim that you have no religion, which is defined by the dictionary as "Belief in and reverence for a supernatural power or powers regarded as creator and governor of the universe."
History
You may be a fundy atheist if....
Any scholar who believes in a historical Jesus must be a theist. If they are an atheist, then they must secretly want to be a theist.
You insist that "Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence", then claim that Jesus never existed.
You contend that no war in history has ever been created by non-belief. Yet, when you are told that 176 million people lost their lives in wars during the last century, created by non-believers like Stalin, Lenin, Mao and Hitler, to name only a few, you reply that those wars fought were fought in the name of ideology and not 'atheism' as atheists "…don't fly planes into buildings or start wars."
You accept (and quote back to Christians) any number of works that say Jesus wasn't the Son of God and call them "honest", "thought-provoking" and 'scholarly" proof, even when they completely contradict each other and come to completely different conclusions.
You think it's entirely possible for documents dated to the 10th century to have been forged in the 14th. (Used of Tacitus once.)
You believe that when our forefathers are framing the Constitution, they're staunch deists, but when they're beating their slaves, they're Bible-believing Christians.
You think that the Declaration of Independence is unconstitutional because it mentions "the creator".
On, that basis, You think that the Declaration is therefore void and the United States should return to British rule.
When it is returned to British rule, you plan to go straight to London and tell those Brits that having the Anglican church as a state church violates the constitutional separation of church and state.
When you use a historical point to prove Christianity is false (i.e., pagan parallel to Christianity), history is objective truth. When a Christian uses real historical scholarship to prove you false, history was written by subjective men and therefore cannot be trusted.
You reject what Cornelius Tacitus wrote about Jesus, dismissing it as "too late", but you readily accept what he wrote about Tiberius and Augustus.
100+ year old scholarship is good enough for you.
You think Bolshevik Revolution leader Leon Trotsky was a far better person than Mother Theresa.
You apparently think the first century AD was in the Stone Age, since you refer to Christianity as "Stone Age beliefs".
When Christians tell you that The Bible is inerrant you go on and list a bunch of "contradictions"; when the Christian shows to you that those are not contradictions but the result of taking things out of context you list more "contradictions" when the Christian does the same with those you complain that he/she is just making stuff up and/or that the answer the Christian gives you are not "satisfactory" and proceed of course to list more "contradictions".
You like to complain about the wars and killings found in the Bible and like to claim that this is some sort of proof to conclude that it is not The Word of God. When the Christian points out that the Bible is about reality and that it exposes humanity and all what comes with it, you complain that it is nonsense and that no good God would allow for that to happen. You would then just claim that it is too perfect and not true.
You like to list contradictions to Christians like if you some how pretend that Christians are not aware of them or that they are igorant about their own religion.
You evidently think that slaughtering 6,000,000 Jews is no different from using sugar in your porridge,since whenever someone points out that Hitler's actions show him to VERY UN-Christian,you exclaim "No true Scotsman uses sugar in his porridge!"
You think historians Michael Grant and Robin Lane Fox are "religious nutcases" for believing Jesus existed.
You refuse to use the word "excruciating" because of its origins in describing the agonies of crucifixion. (ex crucis - "from the cross")
When a Christian tells you that in order to fully understand The Word of God you need to open up your heart and allow The Bible to speak to you and to read The Bible by placing confidence in God, you say that the Bible is just a book and that why you don't have to do the same with Harry Potter.
You always refer to C.S. Lewis as "that traitor."
You desperately wish that Stalin and Mao hadn't been atheists.
You absolutely insist a Christian recognize your nonscholar as an expert (G. A. Wells) but refuse to recognize his legitimate scholar as expert (Colin Hemer).
You not only spell "God" with a lower case "g," but you also add an "E" to "B.C.," and replace the word "Christ" with an "x." Yet, when asked to name the planets you have no problem with spouting out the appropriate list of Roman Gods. Heck, you'll even spell them with capital letters! Not only that, you can even spell and pronounce the name of the 800-mile-diameter Trans-Neptunian Object 'Quaoar', and are delighted that it comes from the creation mythology of the Tongva people (aka the San Gabrielino Native Americans).
In addition, you say that terms like "AD", "BC" and "christmas" (as opposed to "winter holiday season" :D ) are medieval, outdated, bigoted poison and must be eliminated at all costs from the world, yet the fact that our months and days are largely named after Roman, viking etc. figures (eg. Janus - January, Thor - Thursday) is a glowing testimony to the diverse and wonderful nature of human history
You think that religious wars have killed more people than any other kind of war, even though the largest wars of the last 200 years (World War I and II, Civil War, etc.) had no discernable religious causes.
You think that the Spanish Inquisition killed millions (or at least hundreds of thousands), even though the population of all of Spain at the time of the Inquisition was only about five million, and the actual total killed numbers about 2000. When informed of this, you accuse the informer of belittling or being insensitive to the deaths of 2000 individuals.
You bring up the alleged 'horrors' of the Spanish Inquisition to show how evil the church is. When shown that the SI was not the horror that it was painted to be, you switch gears and ask if the believer notes this because they think people are justified to feel moral revulsion with the Spanish Inquisition as it is commonly understood.
In a coffee table conversation you hear religion represented in a positive light. You immediately start preaching about the Inquisition and the Crusades to put things back on track. After all, "we cannot allow a Divine Foot in the door".
You believe that Christians burned down the Great Library of Alexandria. When you learn that this was impossible, you assert that it is obvious that Christians did burn a lot of ancient books. When you are shown that this too is false, you wait a while, then make the same claim again, hoping that the person who corrected you with the facts won't notice.
You desperately confer with other skeptics to try and refute the evidence that Hitler's Holocaust was evolution-inspired, because, darn it, you just GOTTA prove that Hitler was a Christian.
You're convinced, despite evidence to the contrary, that Christianity was responsible for the Jewish holocaust because, dang it, that just SEEMS like something Christians would do.
You believe that Hitler claiming to be a Christian is undeniable proof that he was a Christian, while George Washington only claimed to be a Christian in order to win the people's favor.
You adamantly refuse to recognise the historical fact that "scientific atheism" was both a foundational philosophical position and an actual policy of the Soviet Union from the time of Lenin on, responsible for untold persecution, torture, suffering, humiliation and death far in excess of the numbers of the "victims" of Christianity.
On the other hand you further show your ignorance of history by constantly repeating "whoppers" about the numbers of victims of Christian Inquisitions, crusades and witchhunts dredged up from various unscholarly hate sites and passed off as historical fact.
For example...you can claim with a poker face that 9 MILLION women were put to death as witches by Christian fanatics in pre-Enlightenment Europe.
You assert that the 300 Protestants put to death under the reign of "Bloody Mary" in 16th century England stand as absolute proof of the inherent evil of Christianity but the tens upon tens of millions killed by Marxist regimes under Stalin, Mao and Pol Pot in the 20th century have absolutely NOTHING to do with the profound atheism inherent in these regimes.
You really believe that the Enlightenment made people more enlightened.
You think that Robert Green Ingersoll and Joseph McCabe are two of the greatest philosophers of religion ever to have lived - certainly far superior to nobodies like Thomas Aquinas or Blaise Pascal.
Indeed you believe that McCabe is "One of the giants of not only English Atheism, but world Atheism". [which could be construed as a slight on the intellectual quality of atheism].
You adhere to a false and fictionalised version of history gained from watching Hollywood movies such as Inherit the Wind so that you can (for example) conclude: "the controversy over creation and evolution was settled way back in 1925, when Clarence Darrow eviscerated William Jennings Bryan in a country courtroom in Dayton, Tennessee."
You think that Pope Leo X may have really called Christ a fable, because it's "the type of thing he would say," but you deny that God could have said what the Bible attributes to Him because it is recorded by "anonymous" witnesses.
You've never understood why merely uttering the phrase "Christian America" is not considered to be a declaration of treason against the "TRUE" United States of America.
You think there's more evidence for the existence of Wonder Woman than for Jesus.
You complain about desecrating the Koran while holding a burning Bible.
You think religion is "the original war crime".
You think the Ku Klux Klan and the Christian Identity movement are representative of "mainstream" Christianity.
You think serial killer Dennis "BTK" Rader is a "model Christian" and Olympic Park/abortion clinic bomber Eric Rudolph is a "good Christian boy". Anyone who argues otherwise is committing the "no true Scotsman" fallacy.
You believe that "if it weren't for the U.S. Constitution, Christian leaders would be burning women at the stake."
You continually argue that Hitler was a "real Christian" even when he and his fellow Nazis were slaughtering millions of people (and you "conveniently" ignore the very obvious distinction between someone claiming to be a Christian and someone actually living as a Christian, and the fact that the Nuremberg prosecutors denounced Nazism as fanatically ANTI-Christian!), but you deny that the scientists who rejected Galileo's work were real scientists.
You insist that the historical data is too sparse to know anything about the ancient world, but you then proceed to tell us what 'actually happened' anyway.
Christians
You may be a fundy atheist if....
You think if a Christian won't address your arguments, they are too frightened to do so, or know they can't answer them; but if they do address your arguments, you think it is because they are "threatened" by them.
Missionaries who give up their personal comfort to aid starving, impoverished and persecuted third-world people are actually "corrupting ancient tribal cultures with western religious dogma", while you sit at home and complain about the price of KFC.
You believe that any Christian who claims to have once been an atheist is either lying or was never a "true atheist."
You think that John Shelby Spong is a reputable theologian but that Ben Witherington is merely an ignorant biblicist.
You assert that the crimes and failings of some Christians (acting inconsistently with the teachings of Christ at that!) disproves the whole edifice of Christianity but that the crimes and failings of some atheists (acting consistently with the fact that atheism can provide no basis for objective morality!) should on no account be held against the philosophy of atheism.
You assert that there is no absolute categories of good and evil, that all morals are merely personal, social and evolutionary constructs but then you can still describe Christians and Christianity as absolutely immoral, repugnant and evil and a danger to humanity and not feel even a twinge of hypocrisy at the monumental illogic of your position.
You think that Josh McDowell represents the apex of Christian scholarly apologetical thinking.
You lump all Christians in with whatever religious fruitcake is the flavour of the month, while living with the delusion that there are no atheistic weirdos out there.
You KNOW that religion causes violence and repeatedly tell this to everyone, hoping to save the world, but you don't believe that TV violence causes any real life violence. In fact, you are offended by this objection, and you have already started to figure out how to refute it. To increase your fundy factor, you have decided not to study social sciences. (Once you heard about Rodney Stark's For the Glory of God - you certainly would not bother reading it - you thought that sociologists were Christian fundamentalists in stealth mode, trying to push religious worldviews.
You think that taking the Bible seriously is the obsession of a fanatical fringe group of right-wing, extremist Christians who do not represent the views of the historic Church or of contemporary enlightened, liberal, skeptical "Christians" who according to you supposedly "fill" the mainstream churches and who on close inspection pretty much reflect your own politically correct views and values - and skepticism - about God. [Sort of like former Bishop Spong].
You claim that the theories and opinions of certain liberal scholars are absolute facts although you shy away from debating such issues with someone equally or better informed than you are.
You get angry when Christians tell you you're going to a place that you don't think exists.
You're convinced that people only believe in God because they're afraid of going to hell...despite the fact that if there is no God, then there's probably no hell either.
You consistently decry Christians for soliciting financial support yet find no problem in atheistic 'missionaries' doing the same thing."
You think that 'mission statements' on Christian websites proves the authors are biased which automatically renders the material on those sites weak and unscholarly yet you see no problem with 'mission statements' glorifying naturalism found on atheistic websites.
When a group of Sydney University (Australia) academics, including a historian, sign a public statement saying the Jesus Christ is "one of the great figures of history" and that his claims to be Son of God "bear up under closest scrutiny", this is a gross abuse of their position. But when Richard Dawkins uses his position as an Oxford professor to pontificate on his atheistic religion and related philosophical matters outside HIS field (animal behavior), that is a responsible use of academic freedom.
Further to the above, you're paranoid that these Christian academics will discriminate against you, even though their statement hasn't the remotest hint of that. But you applaud Michael Dini, a professor at Texas Tech, who refuses to recommend students for Medical School, even if they got "A"s in their courses, unless they not only understand but BELIEVE in goo-to-you evolution. And you're disgusted that creationist medical doctors have the gall to think they know more about medicine than Dini (who never practised medicine or even went to medical school), because by definition an evolutionist is more knowledgeable than a creationist on ANY subject!
You think Christians are narrow-minded for believing in only one religion, but atheists are open-minded for believing in absolutely none.
You believe that Christianity discriminates, because you have to join their religion in order to be a member of their religion.
You feel that Christians who go into atheist chat rooms are "shoving their beliefs down people's throats", and that atheists who go into Christian chat rooms are only trying to educate.
You think it is a "slam dunk" proof against God when you ask why He doesn't stop horrible things like, i.e., child rape, but evade the reply that you obviously don't want God stopping your own sins by pointing out that it isn't your problem because you don't believe in God in the first place.
You are disgusted with Doctor Paul Vitz's book "Faith of the Fatherless: The Psychology of Atheism" because an educated person with a degree has linked atheism as a psychological condition. Yet, you have no remorse when you tell believers that they are a product of brainwashing, psycho conditioning and wishful thinking.
You believe Freud's theory that all religious experiences are delusions, as the most revolutionary and truthful thought of all times. Yet, you overlook his heavy use of cocaine because "it can't be proven."
You recommend Michael Shermer's book "How We Believe" to all of your friends who are believers and believe that somehow his opinion will give insight into how we actually think. Yet of course, you ignore that Shermer doesn't have any education in Anthropology. Must be a coincidence.
You're stupid enough to think atheists are treated like second-class citizens. Yet of course, you spend most of your day belittling Christians and other religious people.
You're convinced that all Christians are idiots. But when you meet the "rare" Christian who's clearly intelligent, you can only conclude that he was fooled into believing...by the idiots.
You think that the words "Christian" and "sane" are mutually exclusive.
You think that no Christian can ever be a patriotic American, because he will always side with the enemies of truth.
You're proud of being completely free of predjudice, unlike the "typical sociopathic Christian".
You address Christians as "liar","sheepherder", or "looney toon".
You refer to Christian leaders as "fuehrer".
You think Focus On The Family is a "white supremacist hate cult".
You think Satanists are Christians because they "worship a Christian god".
Contemporary events
You may be a fundy atheist if....
You demand that theists explain news items where bad things have happened to theists, even though no theists on the board have claimed that belief in God is some kind of a lucky charm that wards off bad luck.
You demand that theists explain news items where theists do bad things, even though no theists on the board have claimed that it is impossible for theists to do bad things.
The only Commandments you know are the ones that are unconstitutional.
You can't remember if she was Mother or Sister Teresa, but you can name every pedophile priest listed in the media over the last seven years.
You feel that Marilyn Manson is really, really profound.
You think the song "Dear God" by XTC is really, really, really................really meaningful.
You are funding or filming a movie called "Heart of the Beholder" a Secular Humanist movie telling a true story of a video store renting out the movie "The Last Temptation of Christ." The fundamentalist Christian community is in protest of this store renting this movie out. Of course, you also create the image that all Christians were not only opposed to this movie but the fact that with less then 10% of your nation who actually believes in secular philosophy, this movie is actually going to make money. The filmmakers might be suffering from the same kind of false hope they think believers are.
You believe that emotional response interferes with rational thinking. Yet, you think George Carlin is the greatest comedian of all times, because he makes you laugh.
You're saving up to move to some more enlightened place, like Sweden.
You feel that the separation of church and state is a much more important issue than abortion, euthanasia, or infanticide.
You label any change whatsoever in Christian theology or behavior as 'secularization.'
You were too sophisticated to be afraid of (very real) "Reds under the bed" but you nevertheless see Christians behind every act of "evil" in the western world.
You deface money by scribbling God off of dollar bills.
You think God was cruel for killing all of those innocent babies in the flood, and that Christians are cruel for opposing a woman's right to abort her baby.
You think that Reverend Fred Phelps does what he does because of his Christianity, but Reverend Fred Rogers did what he did in spite of his Christianity.
You think the USA is a theocracy.
Public acknowledgments of God remind you of 9/11.
You can't see any difference between publicly acknowledging God(where atheists can hear),and making African-Americans use separate restrooms,or sit at the back of buses.
You spell America "AermiKKKa" and Christian "KKKristian".
You quite rightly denounce the methods of those who deny the historicity of the Holocaust, then use the same methods(inventing excuses to ignore evidence)to deny the historicity of Jesus.
You think it violates the separation of church and state for a city to have a name like Corpus Christi("Body of Christ"), Los Angeles("The Angels"),Las Cruces("The Cross"),Sacrament-o, or anything with San(saint),Santa(holy),or Saint in it.
You believe that nativity scenes should be banned from public view, but that anyone objecting to pornography only has to look the other way.
You object to any mention of "God" and "Jesus" in the media and education systems — except as swear words.
You go to a church wedding or funeral, but only to pray ostentatiously to "the woman upstairs".
You have not seen "The Passion of the Christ," and you don’t know anyone who has seen it.
You think marriage is an obsolete fundy institution — except for homosexuals.
You believe that gender roles are the product of Christian patriarchy, but homosexuals are born that way.
You oppose studying telling schoolkids that the Pilgrim Fathers came to America to practise Christianity free of persecution, that the Declaration of Independence mentions a Creator, and that the first public schools used a Bible as a textbook. But you support using "Heather Has Two Mommies" as wholesome literature.
You support gay rights when they first pushed for ‘rights’, because ‘what consenting adults do in the privacy of their own bedroom is no one else’s business’. But then you want public approval and want to ban disapproval even in private situations.
You think that protestors outside nuclear power plants are dedicated activists, but protestors outside abortion clinics are dangerous zealots interfering with a legal activity.
You think that it's wrong to execute a convicted serial killer, but abortion on demand is a constitutional right.
You uphold a woman’s right to choose, unless a woman chooses adoption, chooses to be a stay-at-home mom, chooses to homeschool, or chooses to start a business.
You start a lawsuit to expunge Christian books from the school libraries in your state because it violates "separation of church and state" that you insist is in the Constitution. Simultaneously you start a lawsuit to defend the right to have books in the same school libraries advocating the religion of Wicca.
You object to using mice for scientific experimentation but don't mind when babies are killed for stem cell research.
When someone refers to an unborn baby as a baby, you say, "Don't you mean fetus?"
You are infuriated that a school in Pennsylvania would issue a statement to its students about intelligent design and direct them to the library for more information, citing the separation of church and state, but you have no problem with a school in California having kids "act out" one of the five Muslim pillars of faith.
Bible criticism
You may be a fundy atheist if....
You become upset when a Christian says that not everything in the Bible should be taken literally.
You dislike how liberal theists try to interpret the Bible for themselves, while you create your own interpretations of the Bible for yourself: (a) Exodus 34 contains a new set of 10 Commandments; (b) Jesus asked His disciples to slay all His enemies.
You have actually calculated, for purposes of "argument by outrage," an estimate of the number of people drowned in The Flood.
You can quote from the bible better than most missionaries...at least the parts where someone dies.
You label all scholars that actually believe the Bible as "biased fundies" while those who don't believe it are known as "honest" and "accepted scholarship."
You insist that the Bible cannot possibly say anything about homosexuality being a sin, because they did not even have a concept of homosexuality at the time the Bible was written...then insist that the Bible says that David and Jonathan were married.
......AND you produce a long list of verses containing the words "children", "touching", and "bowels".
You think you have refuted the whole Trilemma because you've added another alternative to it.
You dismiss any attempt to harmonize the resurrection accounts by saying "one says A, the other says B, but none say A+B", then go on to offer your own elaborate conspiracy theory of what happened to the Jesus' body, describing A+B+C+D, none of which are said ANYWHERE let alone together.
You think that Isaac Asimov was a world-class authority in Biblical Studies.
You make a point of referring to Jesus as "Yeshua" and to God as "Yahveh" in order to hint that they are no different from Molech or Baal.
You use one,or more,of the following alternate spellings: GOD-"gawd" JESUS-"jeeezus" "jayzus" "jebus" "jeebers" BIBLE-"bibble" "babble" "wholly babble" "buy-bull"
You refer to the crucifixion of Jesus as the "cruci-fiction".
When a Christian's interpretation of a passage (based on the social/literary context) solves one of your favorite contradictions, it is only their personal interpretation, and can be dismissed as such. But your interpretation (based on a "plain" reading of the text) to arrive at the contradiction in the first place is entirely objective, and is obviously THE correct interpretation.
Your only knowledge of The Bible comes from searching 'bible contradictions' in Google.
Everytime you don't understand a passage in The Bible, instead of trying to figure it out you blame God for not writing it better.
You think that God would have made things a lot clearer for everyone, ranging from the medieval knight to the Chinese peasant, had He inspired His Word in modern English in words and concepts you could understand. You also ask, when told of the scarceness of paper in the ancient world, why God didn't provide enough paper to write a longer story.
You adamantly believe that "the Bible says pi equals 3" in 1 Kings 7:23 even though: (1) the verse does not make the slightest reference to the calculation of pi, (2) there are more measurements of the bowl from that verse in subsequent verses, (3) the bowl in question could very likely not have been a "perfect" circle with "perfect" measurements, (4) it's not unusual for ancient peoples using ancient tools (or even modern peoples using modern tools) to use round, easy to remember numbers, (5) asking an online math forum results in a refutation of your belief but you ignore what professional mathematicians plainly say (including that the Bible is not in error in this place) and twist their words to make it appear as if they are backing your assertion in order to continue to justify your belief (not that you ever had any intention of doing otherwise in the first place).
You consistently appear on discussion lists demanding that Christians accept your literal interpretation of various scriptural passages just so you can then launch into the usual "argument by outrage" - despite being told over and over that no Bible scholar or school of Christianity shares your particular bizarre literal interpretation.
You pontificate about the Bible as if you are an expert in theology, textual criticism, ancient languages & cultures and much more besides, when your knowledge of the Bible is just cut and paste from atheist discussion lists which cut and paste it from atheist websites which cut and paste it from embarrassingly unscholarly rantings by the likes of Messer's Freke & Gandy and Acharya S, etc.
You can quote Acharya S, Kersey Graves, John Remsburg, and Earl Doherty more fluently than Laurence Olivier could quote Shakespeare.
You create a web site: http://www.EvilBible.com,and post an Evil Bible Quote of the Day on usenet. The quotes always end with: "What kind of person would get their moral guidance from an ancient book of myths and magic that says it is OK to murder, rape, pillage, and plunder?"
You decry Christian missionaries for denying cultural relativism; denouncing their efforts to reform cannibalism, slavery and fear of animist spirits as judgmental intolerance. But your attacks on the Bible merely comprise anguished cries of "how barbaric" rather than reasoned arguments; and ignore all considerations of ritual cleanness, the evils of the Canaanites and the fact that ancient society was always one step from anarchy.
You think Secular Humanism actually promotes religious tolerance. Secular Humanism only tolerates religion; it doesn't accept it.
You claim to hold no Dogma. Yet, you're just as rigid and stubborn with your beliefs as any Dogmatists.
Archaeology continually frustrates your attempts to find errors and contradictions in the Bible, but you continually use the same outdated accusations anyway since you're running out of material.
The only reason you go to hear a concert pianist play Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata is to complain to him afterwards about the name. Obviously it was chosen as part of a conspiracy to hide the fact that the Bible's mentions of the moon giving light were errors rather than phenomenological language.
You visit a planetarium, but afterwards complain bitterly to the director that it uses the Earth as a convenient reference frame, and portrays the Earth as the center of a celestial sphere with the heavenly bodies revolving around it. This, and his use of the words "sunset" and "sunrise", is another part of the conspiracy to legitimize the Bible's use of such language.
When you go to bookstores, you move all the Bibles to the "fiction" section.
You then proceed to move copies of The DaVinci Code to the "non-fiction" shelves.
You insist on capitalizing "atheist".
You take the lack of evidence for the Jesus story being a hoax as evidence that Christians got rid of all the evidence.
You claim that there is no way a book thousands of years old can be relevant today, but refuse to do the necessary homework to see how it could apply in modern situations, preferring instead to argue that God should have provided an updated version.
You respond to arguments about the different points of view in the society of the ancient world by calling ancient people and their way of thinking "stupid".
You once heard something about some document in the Catholic Church which says the resurrection never happened. And despite your never having seen it or even met anyone who claims to have seen it (and despite having no idea who wrote it, when they wrote it, or what exactly it says), you're convinced that this document is far more reliable than the Gospels and thus disproves Christianity, and that the church is hiding it so that they can keep the money rolling in.
You believe that priests are only in it for the money, despite the fact that they make less than almost anyone else with their level of education.
You can't understand why people can't see the logic in your question,"The Lord of the Rings is a book. The Bible is a book. What makes one fiction,and the other true?"
And if they say they don't see the logic in that question, they MUST be lying!
You think that "Lord of the Rings" and "Harry Potter" are more believable than the Bible.
You complain that "Christian Apologists warp the definitions of words to make the Bible say what they want it to say." And then you go on to say that in the Bible, "feet" means "genitals" and "thigh" means "fetus".
General atheism vs. theism
You may be a fundy atheist if....
You find you have a grudging respect for fundy theists for 'sticking to their guns' even while complaining they don't think for themselves.
'Thinking for yourself' means adopting an atheist viewpoint.
When you say "I don't know" you are being brave and honest. When a theist says "I don't know" they are being dishonest and are trying to dodge the question.
When your thoughts on any complex matter are sensible and clear, and a theist's thoughts on any complex matter are mental gymnastics.
You leave 'freethought' tracts lying around, like the littering missionaries.
If someone says 'God Bless' when you sneeze, you make them 'take it back!'
Although you are a 'free-thinker' and 'rational' person, you lose all reason when reading The Bible.
It is OK for atheists to express their godless opinions but the moment Christians do the same you email the ACLU.
You think religious tolerance does not applies to Christians.
You debate (argue, vilify, etc.) as if every theist was a Jack Chick fan, and as if every Biblical inerrantist was a Ruckmanite who believes that the KJV was specially inspired.
You think that Christianity is a 'virulent memeplex' and that atheism is the 'cure.'
You're infuriated by the term "village atheist." You prefer "right-thinking urban humanist."
You can gladly believe any number of conflicting philosophical positions, as long as they're atheistic!
You start a local Atheists and Agnostics Society, the goal of which is to prove through good deeds that atheists and agnostics can be just as generous and caring as some Christians are. When nobody joins, and the club eventually unfolds, you are flustered. You have no idea why a group of people who by definition do not base their morality on anything greater than their own ideas wouldn't jump at the chance to be self-sacrificing for no logical reason.
You get a big kick out of either spamming online Christian forums with offensive material or posing as a grossly over-the-top parody of a Christian on such websites.
You criticize a Christian apologist for using a pseudonym, and register the domain name you use to do it under the name, "Gorgon Pruntky".
You refuse to give your children any name that appears in The Bible.
You don't realize that Landover Baptist Church's website is a parody.
Even when you do realize it is a parody, you think that it's implied arguments are suitable for use as a reply rather than Biblical scholarship.
You call God "she" in the presence of Christians simply out of sheer spite.
You create an Atheist Missionary organization and then call it a thinktank, in a small town in Virginia. Then you heap scorn on Christians for "proselytizing" (Just think about if for a minute, hypocrites!).
You are part of a non-belief organization such as American Atheists, Church of Freethought, Humanist Association of Canada, Student Freethought Alliance and/or the Council of Secular Humanism. You claim these organizations have absolutely no creeds and that the people involved independently think of different things from one another. Yet of course, on your organization's website they define the commonalities that all non-believers follow. Is that not the definition of creed?
You think that spamming Christian chatgroups and discussion lists with expletives and insults demonstrates superior free-thinking, rational, atheistic logic.
You think that it is possible to talk meaningfully about "good and evil" "right and wrong" when decrying the sins of the Church while simultaneously subscribing to the notion that neither sin nor good and evil exist as ultimate categories but only as personal and social constructs.
You have never pondered the question: why does a smart guy like Richard Dawkins regularly give atheists a bad name by putting his foot in his mouth with his inane and ridiculous pronouncements about God and religion?
You have never pondered the question: why did a really smart guy like Bertrand Russell write such a pathetically limp, uninformed and adolescent critique of Christianity in "Why I Am Not A Christian"?
You assert that "faith is believing things which you know aren't true".
You really "believe" that many human beings actually believe things they know aren't true.
You believe the movie Dogma gives the most accurate portrayal of Christian theology.
You feel that prefacing your responses to Christians with the word bull$#@! somehow makes your argument a little more valid.
You take a self-righteous pedantic "stand on principle" against Christian apologists writing under pseudonyms, but always refer to the "Endarkenment" French infidel writer François Marie Arouet by HIS pseudonym "Voltaire".
You find the term 'fundy atheist' meaningless, baffling, illogical and just plain oxymoronic/self-contradictory even though the two terms are not exclusive of each other (except in the minds of fundy atheists, of course).
You've ever called a Christian a "Paulian".
You deny that someone can possibly know they know the truth ('It's just belief, not knowledge,") while at the same time claiming to know the truth.
You write books like Warren Allen Smith's "Who's Who In Hell: A Handbook and International Directory for Humanists, Freethinkers, Naturalists, Rationalists and Non-Theists." You label 10,000 of these famous non-believers, as good, peaceful people who will be rotting in hell because they are or were infidels. While of course you also fail to realize that for every 10,000 of the world's peaceful non-believers, anyone can come up with a book that lists 10,000 peaceful, loving and famous historical believers. Of course, you also fail to realize that you've wasted your time researching 10,000 historical and modern names just because you want people to think 'peaceful' people will be rotting in an afterlife that you don't believe exists.
You think that logical fallacies are only fallacies when theists use them.
You think when atheist,left-wing journalist Christopher Hitchens slammed Mother Theresa,calling her a "ghoul",he's a genius, but when he slams Michael Moore's propagandizing pile of poo, "Fahrenheit 9/11",he's just a drunk.
You hate Christianity because "...it destroys everything that makes us human",and think Christians "have lost whatever vestiges of humanity they had left".
Your favorite words are "ad hominem",even if you can't spell them.
You just can't see any difference between Pat Robertson Jerry Falwell, James Dobson, etc, and Osama bin Laden.
You don't eat at Church's Chicken, and it's NOT because the chicken's too greasy.
You go to work on Christmas and instead take Halloween off.
You go to an Atheism versus Christianity debate in which you must vote for whoever you think wins. The Christian side is represented by a highly prestigious historian and theologian, and the atheist side is represented by a dog that's able to bark the theme song to "I Dream of Jeannie" off key. You vote for the dog.
Every December 25th you celebrate the day stupidity was born.
You think eating bread and drinking wine is cannibalism.
You try to prove that the bible contradicts itself by producing out of context quotes like "God...is...a...liar...." (Genesis 1:3 - 1 John 3:4)
You say you don't believe in objective morals, but....come on, admit it, you think God did some screwed up things, don't you?
You consider "Ha, ha, ha" a substantive rebuttal to an argument.
You say things like, "I can't tolerate religion because religion is intolerant. And no type of intolerance should be tolerated."
When you realize you just contradicted yourself you bring up the Inquisition or pedophilian priests, hoping that someone won't point out that you just changed the subject. In the midst of the ruckus you cause you sneak away. Two weeks later you come back and make the same argument.
You think the fact that God can't make purple burps or squared circles keeps Christians up at night.
You can't believe in a book that was created over two thousand years ago because "we're not sure WHAT happened", but you know for a fact that religion was created tens of thousands of years ago specifically to control the brainwashed public.
You think the fact that Pauly Shore was allowed to make movies in the early nineties is undeniable proof that there is no God....well actually I'm almost inclined to agree with you on that one.
You feel guilty whenever you use the word faith and have decided to remove it from your vocabulary.
You have fallen for the post-9/11 religious paranoia and think that all Christians are "potential" kamikazes.
You have turned into a Jew and say "G-d" for the sole reason of not saying "God".
You complain to Christians that "all your music sucks." When asked what kind of music you listen to you give a list of bands including POD. When someone poins out that POD is a Christian band you say "They can't be, I hear them on the radio."
Once someone finds quotes and/or lyrics proving they are, in fact, a Christian band, you immediately respond, "Well, I don't really care what they believe, I just like their music."
You believe any person who writes a book critical of Christianity is doing it for "education" purposes. Conversely, you believe that any person who writes a book defending Christianity is "just in it to make money."
You may be a fundy atheist if....
You have your own list of how to tell who is a Christian that itself runs on Fundy Atheist principles.
You get apoplectic about being called a Fundy Atheist for believing all those self-evidently true propositions above. And you label all theists as "fundies".
Last of all -- you write this website a letter which includes a rebuttal to the above listing!