Son wants to turn atheist - hubby & I threatened him that he wouldn't receive presents on X-mas... ?

Question

Are we handling this correctly?

B/c that's what X-mas is about... it's about Jesus. If he wants to turn atheists, we will put up an X-mas tree elsewhere and exchange presents only with the believers. Are we handling this correctly? Shirley-

Answer 1

You are either a very odd human or a troll...I can't tell.

Answer 2

Yes, Shirley, you are.

However, be aware that this may turn on you; Junior may decide to use the money he otherwise would have spent on Christmas presents for other things.

Youngsters can be very clever in that way (I speak from experience, having been a youngster, once).

Don't be surprised if one day a particle accelerator arrives in the mail, addressed to Junior.

Be aware that if he has spending power, he may well use it.

All you can do is shrug, resignedly, and say "Well at least he won't be whining about not getting what he wanted".

Parenting, it's tough job.

Answer 3

The best part about being Catholic or Christian to me is that we are FREE AGENTS, we believe because the truth sets us free. Part of that truth is obeying the ten commandments. (Ask him which commandment he doesn't agree with????)



There are a lot of perverted and satanic worshippers out there who do not believe and think they are the center of everything. I don't know how or why someone would be that egotistical. Nothing good can come from conceitedness. If he truly believes in the principle of conceitedness - then his relationships with everyone around him will be needs based, meaning he will only be friends with people if they fulfill HIS needs. This is satanic. God and Jesus are humble - they love us unconditionally. If he can understand that much, he will come around - just show your leadership by loving him unconditionally.

Answer 4

A christian doesn't threaten anyone with withholding someone who turns into a non-believer. All you can do is pray for him. Give him a gift anyway. Eventually he may come around. But bullying a kid into coming back into the fold only sends them away. I've talked to many kids who are now grown who said religion of different sorts were "slammed down their throats". Now they don't believe at all as a result. Don't be an example of this kind of parent. As a christian we have a responsibility to always treat people the way we want to be treated. Threatening will accomplish nothing. Because it will say to a non-believer this: "Well, if that's the way a christian acts, then I want nothing to do with it". Please reconsider your position in this. Don't give christians a bad name by doing this to your son. God bless you and your family.

Answer 5

Madam, I mean no disrespect, but this will just alienate your son from you. He will feel guilty, then confused, and wonder how bad he must be that his parents won't give him presents or even try to understand. This will make him feel isolated, and feeling that is one of the main reasons teens run away from home, because they feel they're parents hate them. Would you really hate your son if he was openly an Atheist? Would you rather he pretend to believe in God to win you approval? Christmas isn't just about Jesus, it's about good will toward people, peace on Earth, happiness and understanding. Why can't you talk with your son about faith and Jesus? Why can't you see that holidays aren't inclusive, but exclusive? Why don't you know that if you push your son away from you, you will push him away from God?

Answer 6

Where's the love?

Jesus went where the "sinners" were. Don't churches pride themselves on calling "sinners"

IMHO you have just given your son good reason for being atheist. Certainly no loving God being demonstrated in your home. No "Come to Me" from the manger. No "we love you anyway and will help you however we can". No "you are precious in God's sight and therefore are welcome at our Christmas celebrations"

Don't you know that doubt is the beginning of faith?

We all have to make the faith of our parents into our own sooner or later and this often means letting the pendulum swinging the other way while we struggle to make sense of it all.

God said "This is my Son in whom I am well pleased".

Cannot you say the same to your own son?

Answer 7

Elm Tree, I understand the stress you are under, particularly if you are a strong Christian. However, now is the time I believe you need to be extra strong in your faith. God sent his son to die for all people of all times of all beliefs, even atheist. He did not show partiality against any one group even though he sent Jesus through his chosen people the Jews. It may just be your son will see things differently if you really present Jesus to all who share your Christmas. Do not go overboard but remind all why we celebrate the birth, so one day we can celebrate the death of Jesus. As a man/God he had to die for our sins since sin originated with man through Satan. Satan had to take an innocent one and kill him, one without sin. When he did, Satan lost the battle and ultimately the war.

Now is the time to let your love for Christ show, your love for your son show and the love for your church show and especially your love for God and what he did for us all. If there have been issues, face them as a Christian, not as a parent, not solely as a human--you are part of God's family use them to help pray your son has enlightenment but do not push him away. He is and will always be your son, always be his mother.

Answer 8

Troll or no, it's an interesting question and a situation that certainly crops up in an era of increasing non-theism.



Christmas, for many people, is about showing people you care and celebrating life... even among people who call themselves Christians, for a great many people do this and just don't think about religion much. Granted, the very devout will go out of their way to inject some Jesus into the affair. But by and large, Christmas is defined in terms of what you can get for someone you care about, Aunt Sandy's mince pie, cousin Jim driving in from Montana, a great dinner, and the fun of opening presents by the tree in your pajamas. Not the loving remembrance of a man nailed to a cross.



I am an atheist, and I still exchange presents with close family. I call my presents to them winter solstice gifts, and they call theirs to me Christmas presents. And it really doesn't bother anyone.

Answer 9

Hubby is a jerk and desires to strengthen up. gay or no longer, Derek is his son. Bailing on the kinfolk through fact something did no longer finally end up the way he needed is fully infantile. Th entire grandchildren concern is even mroe self-based. If Derek became quickly, could you sense Derek could be required to have toddlers in order that your hubby could have his needed grandchildren? that's disgusting. BTW, your son did no longer turn gay. He got here across he became gay. possibly he will later detect he became unsuitable. maximum possibly he won't.

Answer 10

I understand your reasoning but bribing him with presents isnt going to build faith in him. A long time ago when my kids were little I heard at a Sunday talk that you should teach your children to love God and then they will want to worship him and obey him because they love him. One way is by reading with them from the Bible. It teaches us what a wonderful God Jehovah is and how he provided us with many good things that makes our life happy such as good food to eat, the beautiful earth, families and friends, the animals, flowers etc. Also how he gave his only begotten son who died for our sins so that we could gain everlasting life. We have a book called My Book of Bible stories that is wonderful for kids. These are not just cute kid stories but real Bible stories (Genesis-Revelation) that is formatted so its easy to understand. Not just for kids either, the whole family can benefit and learn. You can write and request a free copy at Jehovah's Witnesses 25 Columbia Heights, Brooklyn NY, 11201-2483 or you could call the local Kingdom Hall in your area and someone would bring one to you.

Answer 11

You do know that the Christmas tree, the mistletoe, and all the frippery surrounding Christmas is PAGAN in origin, don't you? To make the forced conversions a little less painful, early meanie Christians allowed the pagans to hold on to some of their customs and basically co-opted them. There's no reason your son can't enjoy the secular aspects of the holiday season and wish folks a happy Solstice.



Besides, would you rather he lie about being a Christian or be honest with himself?



And maybe in a couple months I can with you happy Mithras!

Answer 12

wow I love all the ppl on R&S, really religious ppl say they do not celebrate christmas in that way.... presents and trees and all that crap. But then we have other christians who want to keep "THAT" part of christmas from their child, because your kid wants an opinion of his own. You are celebrating the commercial part of christmas, the same as most non believers do.....hahahaha! Bet ya didn't know that.

Answer 13

No your not being accepting to his beliefs and making a stupid threat so that he does not become a atheist. I celebrate X-mas even though I'm an atheist and my whole family is atheist because it brings people closer together. It's not about a stupid baby who got precious metals for a b-day presents and still grew up poor. You should accept your child for who he is and not try and threaten him so that he claims to be something he's not

Answer 14

If Joseph Smith did not translate the Book of Mormon as a work of ancient origin, then I would move heaven and earth to meet the "real" nineteenth-century author. After one hundred and fifty years, no one can come up with a credible alternative candidate, but if the book were false, surely there must be someone willing to step forward-if no one else, at least the descendants of the "real" author-claiming credit for such a remarkable document and all that has transpired in its wake. After all, a writer that can move millions can make millions. Shouldn't someone have come forth then or now to cashier the whole phenomenon?

Answer 15

Absolutely not! That will prove to your son he should not believe in God or Jesus if that's what it causes you to do to him. satan would use that to keep him far from you for years never forgetting it. All the devil would have to do when he is inclined to have any faith is to remind him of this and say, See? what did I tell you ... those hypocrites don't care about you do they?



Jesus once said to me after my arguing with anti-Christian college students, Do not argue me. Do not argue me. My enemy has many weapons and uses them. My weapon is love. Use my weapon of love for no one can stand up to that.

Answer 16

If he's really young it might work for a while, and then it will backfire very badly.



If he's 13 or older, not a chance. He'll either agree not to get any more presents or realize he made a mistake by openly talking about religion with his parents. From now on he'll pretend.



edit: oh, and I gotta agree with the troll-callers... are you for real?

Answer 17

Well, you shouldn't be threatenening him either way. But it seems like if he's an Atheist, he would have no longer have any interest in Christmas, so why would he even want to celebrate with presents and all that???

Answer 18

no offense but if may have helped if you raised him better. for a boy to still live at home and be disciplined by his parents to decide he is an atheist, something must be wrong with the parenting in the home. the bible says train up a child in the way he should go and when he is grown he will not depart from it. I know it is hard for you to hear but if you listen to this truth you will have a chance to get it right and train you son the right way. start by getting in to a good Bible preaching church. i recommend the independent baptists churches. they actually preach directly from the Bible and make no apologies.

Answer 19

Troll.....Xmas has its origins in the pagan festival of Yule (Dec 21) NOT the birth of jesus. Just like easter (beltane) is not the celebration of the resurrection of jesus, but the resurrection of new life on earth.

Christians stole pretty much all of their symbols and beliefs from older religions......its nothing new or original.

Answer 20

Perhaps instead of threatening your child with the taking away of worthless material gifts, you might try talking to him, getting his perspective, and finding out what changed his mind on religion.

Answer 21

Christmas is about giving as well.... in fact as humans we should TRY our best to install that value into us, that giving and selflessness makes us happy



besides, its Christmas... if he isn't feeling Jesus in his heart then using material items to get that back is the ABSOLUTE WRONG way to go about it



good luck

Answer 22

"...while we were still sinners, God sent his Son to redeem us..." God did not wait for our "conversion" or our goodness -- or belief in him for that matter -- before sending his Son.



To put conditions on gifts is to negate what the term "gift" means. Freely given...no strings attached. Give gifts for the joy of giving...from your heart. Do not determine who deserves what.

Answer 23

Totally correctly. I would submit however that if you truly want to celebrate the intent of Christmas, you should take the money you would spend on gifts for friends and family and use it to help the poor.

Answer 24

Faker... If you weren't, you'd be horrid parents. If it was about Jesus only at your house, then why even do gifts or have Pagan symbols like a tree.

Answer 25

Threats for not thinking and believing how you want them to - how very Christian!



I hope you're a troll. If you're not, you're a sorry excuse for a parent. <3

Answer 26

Xmas was not originally a christian holiday, nor was easter, both were stolen by christianity from the pagans. Your belief is also nothing but a ******* cult, and you live in an illusion.

Answer 27

LOL



I just love your 'incaranations'



Am I the only one who saw your sarcasm when you said, "that's what X-mas is all about..it's about Jesus" when you purposely took Christ out of 'Christ'mas? LMFAO

Answer 28

Oy...so Jesus is about presents?

Give me a break!

You know what it is truly about.

Answer 29

Sounds like a loving Christian attitude.



NOT.

Answer 30

Free Thinking may be the best gift he gets this year. It's totally worth it, I think.

Answer 31

troll

Answer 32

So much for "free will" - not in your house.

Answer 33

TROLL (I hope)

If not... you know xmas was originally pagan?