Question:
Is love, caring, forgiveness really a choice?
anonymous
2012-08-26 09:05:13 UTC
I want to challenge some of you who believe it is a choice, and for you to give me your opinion.

I do not nesseary believe caring, forgiving and loving is a choice, what I mean by this is we all got different feelings, different emotions, some act on there emotions and feelings differently to others, and some have different emotions and feelings to others.

Example, I can not kill an animal, lets call this animal a dear, I can not take a gun, or a knife and go into the forest searching for a dear to hunt and kill, even if it is for food, I will feel wrong, I will feel like I am being cruel. Where as, my friend who goes hunting for meat to eat and sell, can go into the forest with a gun, blow the guts out of the animal put it on Facebook and feel like they have done nothing wrong, I know this may sound cruel, but we all need food to eat, such as meat, so animals do need to be killed so we can have food, now I can't kill an animal because of my feelings and emotions, while some one else can, as they do not feel guilty, like I will! Therefore, I care so much for animals that I can't bare to see a death or an animal physically, where some others can!

Another example, someone kills my wife, I will hate that person for forever , I will never be able to forgive that person for what he or she has taken away from me, for taking another ones life, more importantly the love of my life, life. It will be easy for me to say,"I forgive you.", but in my heart I will not be able to forgive that person. While some one else, after a couple of years or months, may be able to let it go and truly forgive what that person has done, while others in there hearts can't. It is so simple to say,"just let go." or "just forgive.", but for me to apply that in reality, will be impossible for me, because of my feelings and emotions, my thoughts, etc.

Another example, I can not love a person who walks around the malls, taking drugs, calling others names, swearing at random people, acting like they think they are so cool, I will instantly have bitter in my heart for that person, I won't absolutly hate that person, but I will dis-like him or/and her, and I won't be able to hang out with them, as my emotions and feelings (heart) will get hurt, while others would not hang out with them, but they would not give to damns, what they do or don't do, and while others, really love that type of life style, and will hang out with them.

So, we have established that everyone is different, with different feelings and emotions, and I think we all know that our feelings and emotions is not a choice, I did not choose to cry and cause to be hurt, when I saw a cat get ran over by a car now did I? I naturally, just cried, and wish I never saw it and I was really hurt, while my friend, did not cry, and did not feel hurt, he just felt "poor cut." he got home and carried on doing whatever, he normally does, without feeling anything about this cat that has just been ran over, where as me, I got home and I would not be able to carry on doing whatever, without feeling absolutely sorry and sad for the rest of the evening while my friend did not feel sad. So now we know that our feelings and emotions is not a choice, if it was, I would of chose to not feel heart broken when I saw that cat being ran over, because why would I choose to feel hurt and full of grief and sorrow?

Now my point is, how can God say "forgive everyone." when it is impossible for some people to forgive in there hearts, and I know some can, but others can't because of there feelings and emotions, and I proved that by all the examples I gave. How can God say,"love everyone." when I bitterly hate people, who mock, bully, take drugs, etc, how can I NOT build a resistance against them in my heart, when that comes naturally for me?

So is love, forgiveness, caring, (basically emotions and feelings) really a choice? I mean, pure choice, where you can let it go even in your heart, and not just by words.

I believe your feelings and emotions is not a choice, love, caring, forgiving, is all feelings and emotions, so prove me wrong, prove that it is a choice?
Five answers:
Ally
2012-08-26 09:08:33 UTC
ok we both know I was too lazy to read all that but loving and caring is not a choice but forgiveness is
?
2012-08-26 16:20:28 UTC
Wow good question.



I don't know if this will help you but I used to practice Black Magick and it ended horrifically to say the least, but just when I thought it was over for me I was saved by the Lord Jesus Christ. Black Magick involves eastern mysticism meditations as well as the chakras. I believe both these things are going against the One and only true God.



I also used to be a person full of all kinds of wickedness and bitterness, but God, through Jesus Christ has truly changed my heart in the most beautiful, poetic way :) So my point is without the grace of God you are right, but with the grace of God-Almighty I have forgiven everyone that I may have had hate towards before I received the Holy Spirit, and to this day I do not hate a single person on this earth, no matter what they have done.



I used to never care for the poor. Now I can't stop helping them :) And I used to never ever want to help my mom or my dad. Now I can't stop this burning desire in my heart from wanting to serve others :) If you ask God, I guarantee that He will work His might in your life :) He will make your heart overflow with love, joy and compassion as He has with me :)



"If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn't love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clinging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God's secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn't love others, I would be nothing." 1 Corinthians 13: 1-2



"If I gave everything I had to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn't love others, I would have gained nothing." 1 Corinthians 13: 3
?
2012-08-26 16:28:20 UTC
Forgiveness is not an emotion, it is an action that may be based on an emotion. It is the willful act of choosing no retribution. Forgiveness is not easily mastered..but if you can try to understand it in these terms then it may be easier. Forgiveness is the state rendered by the conscious decision to not act on vendetta. It does not mean you like the perpetrator of the act you choose to forgive, it does not mean you want to associate with the perpetrator. It simply means you have made a decision to lay aside hate, to let go and allow any retribution to come from God..this decision for forgiveness must also contain a soul-set that will not glory in the demise or defeat of the perpetrator. To let go is to totally let go. To move foreword without hate. God bless. Remember for every action there is an opposite and equal reaction, we reap what we sow. Deeds are handled by the Creator, and He judges fairly in either this realm or the next.
Bibs
2012-08-26 16:27:50 UTC
Justice demands that evil people who break the law are punished. Justice does not demand revenge, but demands that justice be tempered by mercy. A criminal convicted of a crime will get a shorter sentence if he shows remorse. Love does not mean you have to like the person. Justice means that you treat a person fairly. Love means that you go beyond that. If a person tries to kill you and you disable him and knock him out, love would mean that you render him first aid until the police get there. Your anger may motivate you to kill him, but you help him in spite of the fact you do not like this guy. We are influenced by our emotions but not controlled by them.
Barb
2012-08-26 16:45:20 UTC
Everything that we do is a CHOICE.

Choose God, We Choose Jesus, His ways, His Commandments.

Yes it is a CHOICE, and a CHOICE to follow his Commandments.



IF we Want (CHOICE) God we will CHOOSE to be joined to our Father in Spirit and Truth.

Or we choose to reject him for this world



Due to what Adam & Eve did in the garden, chooseing Satans way instead of Chooseing Gods way it brought such horriable pain into this world. It also brought horriable sin (people following what they believe to be ok instead of following what God says is ok)

Due to these things that people do it brings pain on us. This is why we feel hate, forgiveness, love, murder etc.

All these things are choices that we all follow and make for ourselves. Some people say they were born this way and so on.

Sin can overtake us causing us to do things that we cant stop.

Jesus went to the Cross and defeated this for us, if we will CHOOSE HIM. Then we must keep our faith in him and what he already did for us on the Cross.

In order to do this we must CHOOSE HIM, follow him and walk with him daily.

Understanding him is to know how to forgive and show love. The closer we get to Jesus the easier it is to forgive and love.

Remember, we are human, and the sin nature will show its head, but with Jesus we have the strength to fight it out of our life.





"And if it seem evil unto you to serve the Lord, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord." Joshua 24:15



Forgivness,Love.

Jesus said "If you love Me, you will keep My commandments." John 14:15

"He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him." John 14:21



"A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another." John 13:34

This is a commandment Only if we choose God



Another Choice

Enter ye in at the strait gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way,

that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in thereat:

Because narrow is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leads unto life,

***and few there be that find it.*** Matt 7:14



"And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you." Eph. 4:32


This content was originally posted on Y! Answers, a Q&A website that shut down in 2021.
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