How can I overcome this problem?

Question

This isn't going to be easy to explain, but here goes...

I've been raised in a Christian home my entire life, but a few years ago (around the age of 15), I decided to start taking my faith very seriously. I "got saved". I always had trouble with doubting my salvation, so I prayed for salvation many times. I always doubted it, even though I wanted it with all of my heart, and I repented of my sins the best I knew how. I've been baptized twice. Anyway, I read the Bible, I thought on spiritual things, I prayed quite a bit, I did all that. I considered myself "on fire for God". That didn't last long. I didn't know it at the time, but that point of my "salvation", me taking my faith seriously, was the beginning of a downward spiral of depression and anxiety. Now that I look back, it's crystal clear. As I slowly began learning more, I learned about how impossible and depressing this life was, how many rules and restrictions there were, and, of course, a lot of the things that went on in the Old Testament. Now, fastforward a few years, I am extremely depressed, angry, confused, and so many other things that I can't begin to explain. I am stuck with a mindset that is killing me inside. Religion is the root of this depression, I have no doubt. I can't escape the mindset without getting rid of the religion. Yet, if I'm honest, I don't see how there couldn't be some kind of Creator. But everything about Christianity depresses me. It, to me, appears wimpy, restrictive, a burden of so many impossible do's and don'ts. At times it almost seems like a message of hate. The Christian life appears very, very depressing. That's what completely denying yourself leads to, right? No pleasure at all, period. The only good thing about it, as I see it, would be not having to go to hell. But, even heaven, to me, doesn't seem like it would be all that great. If I'm saved, why do I have these hateful feelings about religion? If I'm not saved, why not? I begged for salvation many times in the past, repented of my sins. Maybe I'm just not one of the "elect", and God created me to rot in hell. I've prayed so much throughout all of this, and God just hasn't been there. I've asked him to help me sort out this confusion, remove any misconceptions and/or legalism, to change my heart into one that loves him and hates sin, to take this depression and anxiety away, but it just hasn't happened. And this wasn't an overnight thing. It gets worse over time, and I'm right on the edge about to fall off. I've prayed a lot, read scripture, talked to many different people, even been seeing a counselor, and I've just now started taking an anti-depressant. Nothing is working. I don't know what to do. Christianity, or religion in general, as I see it thorugh my perspective, makes me extremely depressed, to the point where I don't even want to believe anymore. Which could be a dangerous thing. But if hell is real, I obviously don't want to go there either. I don't know which direction to go in anymore. I wish I could give more detail about this whole situation, but the whole thing is basically a few year's worth of thought jumbled up in my head all at once, just piled up. I don't know how to explain it. Any advice would be appreciated, from Christians, non-Christians, anybody.

Answer 1

Oh Boy, you sound so much like I was 15 years ago, it ain't even funny. This is not a q that can be answered in this short a space. E-mail me, and maybe I can help you. It will be a couple of days before I can get back to you, but I WILL get back to you.



Just a short note:



One of the issues you are facing is the reality of your salvation. In order to know, you have to understand that Salvation is a GIFT. You can't earn it. Nothing you can do to get it, but ask. According to scripture, it is the gift of God, for any who would believe. Because it is a gift, and you didn't do anything to get it... there is nothing you can do to lose it. If you asked God to forgive your sins, and come into life, you are saved. It is a two-part process, though, and from what you said, it sounds like you did both parts:



Romans Ch 10 verses 9-10 and 13 are clear: "9That if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. 13for, "Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.".



So you can know that you were saved, even if you don't feel anything. You have to lead your heart, not let it lead you.



The other problem I can see in your situation is that you are focusing on the dogma of the particular church you go to, instead of focusing on the relationship between you and Christ. You must understand that relationships are not perfect in their infancy, and even in their maturity. We screw up... a lot. It doesn't mean that we are screwed up... a lot. By that I mean that we may fall down and do things our church or denomination deems unfit for Christian living, but since we now understand that we didn't do anything to gain our salvation, and therefore, not even our church or denomination can take it away from us, it doesn't stop us from having a relationship with Christ.



Now I'm gonna blow your mind...



Think of a relationship you have with another person... a Buddy...You do something your mom says is wrong, but your buddy doesn't care. He forgives you. So what if your mom don't like what you did... the relationship is with your buddy. It is like that with the church and with Christ. Often times, the church adds things to their bylaws and principles based on someones interpretation of a certain passage of scripture. It doesn't mean that if you do that thing that Christ will disavow you, as some would have you to believe.



I'm out of space... But maybe I can help...please mail me. [e-mail]



Hope this helps...

Answer 2

God still loves you, of this I am sure. While I cannot pin point the reason you are experiencing this in your life, I may be able to give you another perspective from my own personal experience. The first thing you need to remember is that none of the negative feelings you have are from God. It is possible that He is working something out in your life. All of the negative aspects of my natural personality were not immediately extinguished when I claimed Jesus as my Savior. In fact, as I recall, they got considerably worse. But along with the increase of my "rotten" side, God used that time to educate me on the whys and wherefores of avoiding this sort of behavior. It took some time, and sadly, some time in jail, before I ever started to "get it". But He was faithful to finish the work He started in me, and He placed many good people in my path to accomplish this. Now I am not trying to tell you that walking with Him is a "walk in the park", but the results are well worth the trouble. Today, despite what I thought about myself in the past, I enjoy God's Peace and Joy, but this after enduring the correction that comes from God. That is why we are encouraged to be "over-comers", and not take our hands from the plow. Even Peter had his moments, and I feel like the enemy is requesting your soul to sift it as well. But please take heart. While the ride may get bumpy, we know that we have a high priest that stands in the gap for us, and defends us. Jesus told Peter that He prayed that his faith would endure. Be assured that this is exactly what He is doing for you.

There are times when we need to get out of the way and let God work. This is where the rubber meets the road on the highway of Faith. Lay it at His feet, and know that you are covered. Peace to you. Be well.

Answer 3

What so may be the problem in our life we are not suppose to take decide of suicide. Once we are in selfish mode we think about the suicide. Be thing about others and ever. At the time of feeling suicide follow given points, 1. first leave from that place and gather yourself with the group 2. go to temples 3. call your beloved one 4. break anything you like and drink water this will reduce tension immediatly. 5. Hear the bajans cassette or god songs or melodies one which you unstress yourself. Human life is the golden oppurtunity given by GOD. Be Happy and other be happy

Answer 4

I am in nearly the same boat you are man. My faith is starting dwindle and I feel disconnected from God.... I'm overwhelmed with anxiety and depression but A lot of biblical figures struggled with this too man. Asaph in Psalm 73 struggled so bad that he almost abandoned his God. I advice you to read it ! And really study it. David sinned so many times so badly he was in such a deep depression . He murdered a man, had sex with the wife of the husband he murdered and a child died

Answer 5

Many people's view of Christianity is like this. The reason depression comes is because Christianity is not to be a religion. Christianity would be best described as having a personal relationship with Christ who is always there to comfort you.



True salvation is by faith and faith alone. Faith is fully trusting something (or in this case someone - Jesus Christ). This type of trust does not end with just a prayer. Once a person becomes a Christian it then becomes a lifestyle.



The thing that will confirm of a salvation is a life change. This life change includes a whole new outlook on life. There is a new motive for why a person does what they do. 2 Corinthians 5:17 says, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" As we remember this, we must not forget that God never promises a person that when they become a Christian they will not have troubles. In fact, the Bible makes it clear that there will be difficult times in a person's life, but they must stay strong and know that God has everything under control and is right there to comfort and love them.



Even if times are going tough and it feels like God is no where near remember that He never left you. Christ has everything under control. Comfort should come knowing that God knows what you are going through and that He is right beside you everywhere that you go. God understands all the pain and suffering that this world has to offer.



EVERYBODY does things that displease God. This is called sin.

Romans 3:23 says, "For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God."



The punishment for sin is eternal death in a place of torture all the time called Hell. Thankfully that is not the end. God sent down His son, Jesus, to pay the penalty of everything we do wrong that displeases God.

Romans 6:23 says, "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord."



Christ died so we could live forever in Heaven with Him, but He rose from the dead on the third day of being in the tomb. Because of this we do not have to suffer in Hell and have a new found hope.

Romans 8:1-2 says, "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death."



When a person puts full trust and obedience in Christ they have a whole new outlook on things and begin there life change through Christ.



I hope this helped and God bless,

Tim W.

Answer 6

Posters. Just because you happen to be born into a christian family doesn't mean your belief is right. If you and your family were born in the middle east you would be on another forum telling us how your savior is Allah and that is the true way. If you were born in Jamaica you and your family would be worshipping Rastafari......



No archeological or historical evidence between 4 BCE and 30 AD that a divine jesus ever lived. If christians believe jesus performed miracles and was the greatest man that ever lived then this information should be the centerpiece and headlines of every single piece of literature from that era. There is nothing!



The only PEOPLE who talk about a divine jesus are christians. Over 5 Billion others in this world believe otherwise.



Christians please post back what jesus actual birthdate was? What year he was born? What did he do for a living to support himself? What did jesus look like? Why is it that only ancient people with demons in their heads believe they have seen this character jesus. If you don't know the basic bio answers to someone you call the greatest man that ever lived, then you are fooling yourself.



If there is insufficient evidence to prove that someone existed then there is no reason why you should fear to say so.



The divine jesus story is BUSTED!

Answer 7

Hmm, raised in a Christian home but learned nothing? Eh, I suppose it depends on the church, perhaps it was best. "Got saved" is a clue, though, to a vending-machine God that you've been trying to make deals with for some time. Baptized twice? No, you were baptized once, the second time you got wet. So you went through a downward spiral of depression and anxiety. Strange, that was supposed to happen prior to your being saved, not afterwards! But I actually think you are on the right track with your guilt and who you are before the Lord. Read through the book of Job and you'll see what I mean. Up to chapter 38, Job defends himself as being righteous before the Lord, and in chapter 38, God hammers him.



So you see Christianity as wimpy, restrictive, and a burden of so many impossible do's and don'ts. I think Jesus had a message about cutting your eye out for your hand off if either of them sin. You're right, there's no way to get to heaven on your own. No pleasure at all? I forget which early sect of Christianity believed in that, and Paul said no, not true.



"Not one of the elect"? You don't get to decide that, God does. But I wouldn't even be getting into that right now, you need to be getting back to the basics of Christianity and what salvation is all about. You may want to look at the Heidelberg catechism for some of these answers. It may help, it may not. Good luck.

Answer 8

It sounds like you have become disillusioned with religion based upon the faith you were affiliated with. Interestingly enough, I have spoken to people that have some of the same feelings you have expressed. I noticed you eluded to hell in your comments several times. I would like to address your concern about it. “Hellfire” has been a basic teaching in Christendom for many centuries. It is understandable why The Encyclopedia Americana (1956, Vol. XIV, p. 81) said: “Much confusion and misunderstanding has been caused through the early translators of the Bible persistently rendering the Hebrew Sheol and the Greek Hades and Gehenna by the word hell. The simple transliteration of these words by the translators of the revised editions of the Bible has not sufficed to appreciably clear up this confusion and misconception.” With that said, there is no eternal torment. It is only the common grave of mankind.



If you believe God is a God of love, his requirements should not be burdensome. (1 John 5:3) Take a look at the perfect example he gave us through his son Jesus Christ. We are able to live "normal" lives when we follow his laws which serves as a protection to us. Jesus was able to balance pleasure with spiritual activities. You have to remember you are imperfect and God knows the formation of us. (Psalms 103:14) You are going to make mistakes and fall short sometimes, so don't put undo pressure on yourself that is causng you to develop a unwarranted hate for God. Make a earnest effort to take a close look at Jesus and his teachings. Pay attention to the undeserved kindness and compassion he displayed to all those who came into contact with him regardless of what they did.



Matthew chapter 5 starts the Sermon on the Mount. please take the time to read and meditate on it. Pray and earnestly seek out the truth so you can get a balanced view of what God requires of you.

Answer 9

You sound like your following legalism, not the way of Christ. Jesus said His burden was EASY and His yoke was LIGHT. He said that He calls men out into FREEDOM. Do's and don'ts are our way of trying ourselves to do what Jesus did. That is, took it ALL, if we lay it on HIM. I'm sure you know this, but you need to KNOW IT... deep down. If you doubt your salvation, maybe you haven't fully trusted in HIM to save you, and are still trying to do it yourself. If you can't be perfect... doesn't God know that? Isnt' that why Jesus had to atone for your sins?



Do this... stop worrying. Jesus said don't worry. Take a look at yourself, and if you can get to heaven. If you can't, trust Jesus to get you there, by accepting HIM and confessing HIM as your Lord and savior. Done that? Well, this time, realize that you had to do this b/c you CAN'T get there. Jesus had to carry you the rest of the way... and STILL DOES. So just place simple faith in Christ.



Get the book by R.A.Torry... The presence and work of the holy spirit ..... or just study on the Spirit from the bible (it will take longer to get the verses which are already compiled for you)... and read it. And pray. Keep praying, and try to figure out WHY you want to be a christian.



Do you love God?

Are you thankful?

Why aren't you happy?



Are you afraid of God? Are you unsure about His justice and mercy b/c of what has been done in the past (the killing of children in the Old Testament, etc.). Remember, God is HOLY. Set Apart. And He is NEVER wrong. Whatever He did, it was the perfect way to do it.



View it in the light of ETERNITY. We do not know the eternal destinies of those killed, or what eternal consequences resulted from it.



More questions? Contact me on my site, http://www.fellowship.ning.com



Hope this helped.



God Bless

Answer 10

You sound like you are really struggling. If you have accepted Jesus as your Saviour , then yes you are saved. I have been a Christian for 4 years. I have had alot of the same struggles and they didn't disappear overnight. But I have overcame them and come out stronger for it. There could be so many reasons for your struggles. I couldn't tell you why though. But I will tell you what I did and I still do. I trusted God. Not comepletely, at times. More comepletely at others. I prayed and asked for wisdom and for my spiritual eyes to be opened. I asked countless others to pray for me. And I got mad at God and me He and I had some long talks. Pour your heart out to Him. He is listening. I promise you that. Don't give up. The bible says that we have to resist the devil and he will fflee from us. Keep resisting and submit yourself to God. There seems to be an unrepented sin in your life that you don't want to give up. That was what my struggles came from. Pray about that. Just don't give up[on God. He won't gve up on you. Being a christian isn't boring. All those things that sound fun cause pain and chaos in the long run. You can trust me on that or learn the hard way. Myself, I learned the hard way.

Answer 11

There are so many churches within the christian faith. Something has gone wrong where you are, as no faith is supposed to trouble you so much for so long. Faith is supposed to enrich your (already difficult) life. It is not supposed to be all consuming. The biggest teaching in all churches SHOULD be God Forgives. Human beings mess up. A lot. I don't believe any god could practise real hate. People have a tendency toward knee jerk reactions, people are fearful and suspicious. Faith is supposed to help you avoid the fearful suspicion. Most faiths give god credit for creation. Those faiths SHOULD ALL preach tolerance and love. Faith doesn't bear grudges. But faith is troubled by the decisions people make, the inequality in the world, the suffering and the sheer scale of world issues.

The catholic church taught me that some elements of the old testament were translated by men hundreds of years after the events, even the catholics will admit that some elements of the bible simply don't work. Eg the 'rules' concerning how menstruating women must be kept away from men for weeks. The truth of any faith should not lie in a book but its followers. If your church is causing you to miss out on the joys of faith(there are many i promise you). Then you may benefit from joining another.

Remember what i was told, he who prays the loudest is not usually heard, As god is busy listening to the whispers of those who daren't. Something went wrong with the way you were taught.

Answer 12

When I went through the same situation I found a simple and reliable solution that has worked flawlessly for over 40 years: analytical thought. There are two major things that you must do for this to work and that is be totally honest with yourself and others and rid your life of all faith (base your beliefs on facts and reliability, not on faith). If you can do those two things you will rid yourself of the questions (I call them mind splinters) that cause your depression for the rest of your life.



Let me give you an example: afterlife. First of all, discard everything you have been told and believe about afterlife and then research it from all possible angles to see if an afterlife is even possible. You will find after your research that there is no natural phenomenon that makes an afterlife possible. The only thing that supports an afterlife is a soul and since a soul is supernatural and requires faith to believe in, you must discard the notion that a soul exists. There is no possible way that mankind knows of that supports the notion of an afterlife, therefore you must logically discard the notion.



It really is quite simple to rid yourself of your ailments simply by ridding yourself of faith. Think logically and rationally about everything you believe. If what you believe is based on faith, discard it. Believe in only things you can prove to be true, otherwise discard it. Life is just too darn short and precious to be worrying about something that is not proven to be true.

Answer 13

I am a former preacher, and I had a problem with the bible at first, the way the bible talks everything is ok if god says it is. Rape, murder, slavery, or anything else, is fine as long as you do it in gods name. so the only moral’s there are, is do what your told and your right with god.



But then looking around at the other main line religions we see the same mentality. God is right and we are wrong. Life is only to make god happy, and deny our

Answer 14

I think you need a new perspective on Christianity. Not sure exactly what denomination you are, but perhaps you have grown up in one that has a bunch of man-made rules that really don't relate to Christianity (for example, Catholics and their Lent tradition). You mention that Christianity has so many rules, but that is not what Jesus taught. Jesus said the only two rules are to love God and love each other. That's it. I think if you take a step back and look at what Jesus was trying to teach (that we should just live our lives the best we can with love, and acknowledge that we are not perfect), then perhaps that will help.

Answer 15

I would say to stop looking at all the bad stuff in life and look for only the good things.Spend time listening to real gospel music,bathe your soul in it.The devil is trying to take control of you.He can only if you let him.We are in the end times and these things are going to happen.You have to be strong in the Lord and not let things get you down.I am sending prayers your way .I hope this has been some help to you.A friend in Christ.

Answer 16

abandon Christianity and continue to believe in God?

I've been raised in a very conservative church i don't believe i support, but i had pressure from my family to be baptized into it. I decided to seek God for myself, and I know him better than ever.